BABY TURTLE

Life as Life goes

2012-02-14T19:19:00.000-08:00

We all have our moments of insecurities.

We become uncertain of our directions and decisions. Lose confidences in our strengths and become overly sensitive about our weaknesses. I am having that moment now. Not a huge one but sizable.

Started my new job and I have to say... I love it!!! The outward facing part is fun and filled with adrenaline... They call it business development - totally new to me, but which I have heard I am a natural. Quite surprising considering I do not feel comfortable approaching people with intention... I feel like an insurance agent! The redeeming factor may be that I am really passionate about what I talk about... hence I talk well.

Passion... a term I have not embraced for quite a while and high time I grab chunks and chunks of it... This new job allows me to merge my two passions - Design and setting up hotels. Not that I cannot have both in my previous job but there are obvious restrictions and I cannot fully contribute in a meaningful way. Now I can... and omg that freedom is scary...

Inward facing - I have to manage 20 odd people in a studio. How hard can that be?! Right?

To a certain extend, I can be quite wrong....

I have heard before that an office does not run by itself... and YES.. it does not!!! Damn! You need to motivate the staff, keep them busy, chart their learning and career path, balance the work load, manage office gossip, ensure quality work... its a whole pot of small little things but all interconnected and need to be managed... And more importantly, an office needs a leader.. and hey!!! Last heard, I am the leader...

Uncertainty as to what to do can drive up an easy solution - hide in one singular role and let someone else make the decision. Inaction. Inaction. Inaction. I admit, I do that... at times...

Grow up Gal! Stop hiding and do something! I know what I can do, should do but I am just not doing it!!! One step may not make a world of difference but at least it is a step and it is better than not doing anything. Action Action Action Woman!! Control what you can control and for those that you can't, don't take it to heart! Hmmm.... sounds like what my bestest fren used to tell me all the time....

And hey, I should do just that!

Since the new year, I have met up with many individuals new and old. Not all encounters have been pleasant and good. Some people make me beam, they are so full of vitality and hope even with setbacks in their life. And that is because they find life too precious to be wasted on things they do not believe in and are willing to take a chance and make a change. These friends make me proud.

Other friends prefer a slow and steady decay, blaming everyone else for their misfortune instead of taking things in their own hand. The fact that people I care about prefer the latter life used to bother me greatly. But I have come to understand and accept that while some people are happy being happy, others are very contented being miserable. At the end of the day, I acknowledge that my idea of the way forward may not the same as everyone else. Live and let live. Everyone has the right to live their life the way they wanted it, their reasons may not be apparently to me.

Megan has been extremely trying. All the signs of Terrible Two, except that she is 15 months at best... 2.5hrs of hoaxing and still not sleeping is exploding my patience beyond my threshold. I have no idea how my in laws do it...they can accept such unreasonable behavior from Megan as part of life and live life as normal!!! I am so fortunate to have them around to help out with the naughty one... Megan would have drove me bananas...

Sensing my little stresses here and there, Ken has been most thoughtful. He told me I should stop frowning and gonna smile today because four years ago on this very day, I made a decision that changed my life!!!!.... Huh?!!! "I propose to you on this day four years ago leh..."

Hahahha... sure or not... dunno weather you are telling the truth or not! Hahahhahha but oh geee...YES you are right... I took a chance four years ago and four years later, I am still smiling.... Love you, my bui bui dear dear BBDD.

From your baby turtle (BBTT)

A-Z food book

2011-12-31T06:45:00.000-08:00

My 1-10 book has been a huge success with Megan. My A-Z animal chart... er... not so much. I think the chart is more suitable for slightly older kids ( and my MIL says that some of the animals are too chim!!!)

So I sewed another more Megan friendly A-Z book to get her started. Make it simple, my MIL says... yah but I can't stand A for Apple, B for boy - what is the relation between Apple and Boy??? My A-Z book has to be thematic. And the theme shall be FOOD... Designed and sewn by me, combined and constructed by my Mimi...

The Standard - A for Apple

B for Banana

C for Carrot,

Megan loves carrots

D for Durian.

Megan loves Durian too... dun tell the elders I fed her this...

E for Eggplant.

I wanted E for Eggs but I dunno how to depict eggs

F for Fish

Gee... what an ugly ugly fish!!!

G for Grapes

Sigh, not enough purple felt. A bit weak

H for Hamburger

I for Ice-cream

J for Jelly

K for Kiwi.

Black seeds made of black beads.. textile!

L for Lemon

M for Mangosteen

N for Noodles

O for Orange

P for Pear

Q for Quaker

My mum says PLEASE LAH... But honestly, what alternatives??

R for Rice

S for Strawberry

T for Tomato

U for Unagi

Haahahah... U tell me, U for what?

V for Vegetable

Yah, everyone thinks my V is real lousy and I think so too

W for Watermelon

X for... make a guess

Y for Yam

I am so so proud of my yam.. looks so natural!!!

Z for Zucchini

Megan, mummy didn't know such veg exist until your godma, Meiling, made a very nice Zucchini sandwich for me. Remember to ask Godma to make one for you too when you grow up!!

One month VACATION

2011-12-25T05:23:00.000-08:00

Yes... I quit my job... After two months of notice which include one months of farewell lunches, I joined my fellow friends at the Departure Gate No. 48 and waved goodbye. Ahead of me is one long month of R&R before I embark on another exciting journey with a new bunch of fellows...

Normally, this is the time you will see me backpacking Morocco.. Yippee!!! But the little one at home HOW?? Plus there has been too much backlog in my life that actually really need clearing and sorting... I will put this month to great use.

But before that, let's look at what I left behind...

A zoo!!! and Sue!!!

And while Rita was away for her honey moon in Cuba, I let loose a shark in the ocean. I wonder if she discovered two of her swimmers were er... gone..

So what have I been doing?

Reading Megan good stuff like the 1-10 book the eighty eighth time.

Playing the same old game and see her laugh and scream before you act.

Fighting with her over the remote control... I mean all the remote controls...

Other than spinning around the Megan universe, I have done a few very impressive things...

I watched Boys over Flowers... TWICE... oh he is so good looking, whoever he is...

OMG so good looking...

I am in lust after the new Panamera after I saw this car's sexy butt... oh so good looking...

Oh yah.... I don't have a driving licence YET and last heard I skipped my FTT!!!

Broke my three shoe rule and expanded my collection to five. oh so pretty.....

Did someone just say "so shallow"... hello? Did someone just speak???

The Conversation IN the pool

2011-12-18T01:58:00.000-08:00

Bali is HOT HOT HOT... I am totally sun burnt.

Someone said we were like monitor lizards swimming in the pool... But we look more like hippos trying our best to float. Actually I think we did not even make any effort to float our fat asses... We all just sat there.... did we not??? BUT we are such intelligent hippos!!! Just hear us talk...

Under the influence of ice cold beer, we became smarter...

Then came the coconuts and hmmmm.... the conversation really got heated up.

I think it all started when sumone wanted to float her coconut drink.

A: Too bad coconuts cannot float
B: Coconuts can float... see see... it floats but is toppling over
D: Cannot float lah... no husk how to float! This one the husks all removed liao for us to drink
C: isn't this the husk?... the husk is on the outside, this white part?

D: No lah... I watch a documentary of a monkey peeling the husks away in sections, don't look like this one... The husks are all removed...
C: Please!! This coconut has not been husked lah... this outside skin is still green... green color on plants means has the ability to make food so this is the outer most skin of the fruit!!! If this part is the outer most skin then this part is the husk!!! You are holding the whole fruit not a dehusked version!!!
D: Wha, your biology very good leh
A: What biology??? Coconut should be under botany right?

D: So you mean the husk is inside ah... Ai you, ell us the answer leh you v smart one...
B: If I am not wrong, textbook says the husk is in the inside..

C: No!!! Look look look. This skin is already starting to peel in shreds... this is THE fibrous husk!!!
A: Then where is the hard brown shell? Inside? I don't see leh... you know the market auntie grind the coconut milk is always white on the inside, brown hard skin on the outside.. this one not brown leh...
D: yah, I watch the documentary, the monkey did not peel this, the monkey peel a brown husk... Later ask your father will know.

A: Why must ask my father? Because he is the monkey who peel the husk? So he knows???
D: hahahah...No lah... people stay in kampong will know wat...
C: Please loh... coconut trees grow by the beach... Not in kampong ok

To protect the identities of these intellects, all names of personnel involved have been replaced with ABCs... I can just say they all look like the photo below:

A: then durian float or not huh?

E: No... There must be a reason why fruits have the ability to float one. Durian no need to disperse by the sea what so don't need to float

A: Oh... this is the logic...U sure?

B: But But apples float what.

E: Shit...

C: Er... can ask them to buy some fruits later so that we can do some float experiments here???

.......................

Bali Trip - Villa Tandeg

2011-12-18T01:35:00.000-08:00

Many important and memorable events happened in the last quarter of the year but I have not been able to blog them... I have been so busy I don't even remember the last time I sat down to watch TV... let alone time to reflect on past events through blogging...

Megan has turned one and it is time for the ultimate test - bring her on an overseas holiday trip.... Honestly, just thinking about it paralyse me in fear... but it has to be done...

This is not some "I brought her to europe by myself" feat.... it is a family trip with ken's parents and sis, ken's cousin n nieces... You will say "Chey, what is the challenge?"... Well, just look at the photo of Megan and ONE of her luggage...

This is also not some intensive travelling trip... We stayed at a local boutique resort in Bali called Villa Tandeg, recommended by Peter Kelly (again). A three bedroom villa cost US$275 nett daily. Its not because it is cheap that we flocked over... It is because Peter says each villa comes with a housekeeper, nanny and chef who look after you, your kid and cook for you when requested... did I hear ... nanny.... look after you, your kid.... ok ON.

This is how our 3 bedroom villa looks like - featuring living room and kitchen at the end...

Opposite side of the living room is the dinning pavilion where the chef cooks up a feast everytime we request for food... simple Balinese fare but oh so good. Rate includes daily breakfast and airport transfers but if you want the chef to cook dinner, just tell her what you want to eat and what time and pay her grocery and taxi fare... Eating like this sure beats going to a restaurant... plus v economical too.

Villa has big enough daybed which sits the whole family while Huiling facetimes her brother on the latest updates of her relaxing spa and show the exciting color of her toenails via ipad...

Bedrooms are great for playing NO ESCAPE with Megan... Everyone slept well except poor Megan who cannot adapt on her first day and cried and cried... Our attempts to make her fall asleep peacefully in this strange new place failed miserably... we were saved by the in laws.

Study converted into a spare bedroom for the Wenling and Xingyi.

Bathrooms fail...
Water pressure too low and has no thermostatic control... Gee... I am not trying to turn this stay into a resort assessment... But bathing Megan here was difficult... water is either too hot, too cold, too fast, or too slow.... and which luggage did we pack her shampoo???!!!

Patio was occupied by Megan and her feeding requirements... A safe place where she can see the action without getting into the action.

... but she also has a lot of action action one.

We have a fish pond to woo enthusiastic feeders...

And most importantly- a pool facing the rice fields to make us stay in rather than venturing out... Considering that this is the first time 8 out of 9 people have been to Bali, we can conclude that either we were very comfortable in our villa or we were very lazy...

There is a pattern to pool usage. The first day we swim like an average of a lap per person... then we play with floats and splash around. As the days go by, chilled coconuts start to make their apperances, then came coke, wine, beer....

Activity started to concentrate on the shallow side of the pool with bowls of kachang, chips, ice-cream.... no more splashing can be heard... only occasional moans of how fat peopke have become but the munching seem to continue...

Ah yes... the ugly black netting which appeared after a while -

Daddy stood there making a statement, "I think... this place must have monitor lizards, the netting is to prevent them coming here to swim..."

... "er daddy, we just requested them to childproof the pool from Megan an hour ago..."

Megan's first pool experience -
We have been preparing for Megan to swim since she was a few months old... As a diver's daughter, Megan must love to swim- else I malu in front of other divers. To prep her for the colder waters of pools, seas, lakes etc in future, dad and me agreed to bath Megan with progressively near room temperature water instead of warm water that she was used to as a baby. We also progressively splash and pour water over her head during bath time to reduce her fear of water in her eyes...

Ken bought Megan an ultra cute mushroom float for her first attempt in the pool... who can resist going in!!??

Our second day try was an absolute success. Seeing other children splash around must have distracted Megan from the fear and soon she got too engrossed with splashing water on the girls...

...and on her dad...

...and all over herself!!!

With the buffer of so many people to help look after sweetie pie, I slowly began to really enjoy the trip... Many things I have learned on this first trip with my one year old.

1. Logistics
What to bring for check-in, cabin carry, handcarry... how long we need to be out, what she needs, who is freeat what time/place to look after Megan, any backup support... rotation of feeding/ washing/ sterilizing, etc.... Logistics of everything Megan is constantly on my mind and at times I saved the day while other times I over-reacted. Generally I am constantly distracted...

2. Support
Support of my in laws saved the day... day to day... support of young kids too cannot be under estimated... I think Megan would not have such a great time without the great company of WenLing and XingYi.

3. The Environment

I just watched a documentary on Singapore kids who are fearful of sand, grass etc because they do not want to get dirty... It dawned on me in Bali that I am hesitant to bring Megan overseas because I myself pre-amp her resistance (and my difficulties) to new environments.

As I watch Megan unturn stones, pick up dead leaves, attack an ant and reach for spider webs... My reflex went " NO!!! dirty dirty!!!!" Luckily my Brain stopped me by immediately flashing me a sarcastic banner saying "crazy over reacting mother"

Megan too learned many new things... She learned how to be comfortable with strangers and allow herself to be carried by others... She learned how to climb steps which translate to everyday context meaning climbing our sofa. She understands when we tell her to hold our hands for safety. Started to dance to the rock n roll music... Swim.. and most importantly... she survived a Bali trip!

And so did we...Way to go!!!! Lets do it again...

Happy Birthday Megan

2011-11-26T07:06:00.000-08:00

Ken and me have been so busy that we left the planning of sweetie pie's birthday to the very last minute. At least we booked the function room, now what is left is the cake, food, deco, guests, Megan's new clothes and shoes etc...

We do not want to repeat the chaos of too many people AGAIN so we split the celebration into two separate Fridays!! 12th for ken's side of the family and our few close friends with children while 18th to my side of the family.

I have no idea how to decorate the area until Dolly inspired me with her polka dots & Elmo theme for Jake. The party deco theme shall be orange and white and walls decorated with playful little tigers - literally Megan the little tigress!! Cross my fingers that the scheme turns out ok...

Thank goodness for the help of chye chye, lewis, meiling, Robin and wife... Ken gives the thumbs up!

The star arrived late having overslept...

She is totally in a grumpy mood... OMG I look like an old auntie....

There is something about first birthdays that always feature an oversize cake. We belong to the cliche group and ordered a massive baby dress cookies and cream cake. Surprise surprise, it tastes good.

Gyan is so sweet. He says he wanted to pass his present to Megan himself. It was a big and heavy present and he waited very long for Megan to acknowledge him... Sigh... Megan, please be nicer to Gyan next time ok?

Meiling trying to entertain her god daughter..

I have better luck.

Catching up with Stacey is so good... Ejin pointed out that Megan's head is SO much bigger than Shanice's!!! gee.. that is true.

Sherlyn, tell me your secret of looking so good pregnant and looking after your little boy at the same time... How come I look like an old auntie?

Control yourself Andria...

Kids know how to entertain themselves..

I always love to see Megan and Erin together...Erin is alwayss so sweet and gentle while Megan all over the place. Poor Erin was trying to reach out to Megan and interact but Megan was only interested in lazing on Ken and biting her hands!!! Ah duh!!

Daddy and Mummy's little pearl, Happy One Year Old!!! I know you cant remember a single thing but hope you had fun!!

The Adventures of E500 & IX3

2011-11-01T00:58:00.001-07:00

My E500 as I know him, loves travelling more than anything. One day, he told me that he heard the dessert sands calling. He told me he must go... So together with IX3, they departed suddenly one Friday afternoon.

I was in Shanghai, he was in Uzbekistan. I missed him immediately.

The ancient cities of Samarkand, Khiva, Buhkara and Tashkent.

These are names I hear old folks speak of in legends. A land far removed from our world. A land of a bygone era. I imagined it as a scene right out of Marco Polo's journal - A city suspended in time. Buildings threatened by the lethal dessert dust. Residents, all rich merchants and great crafts people. Nomads, travellers with caravans selling their wares, exchanging tales of other faraway lands.

This land, some twenty five hundreds years ago was at the crossroads of the greatest trade route in history - the legendary silk road. My silk road. And the extension of myself, my E500 was there.

For two weeks, E500 did not send word. I grew anxious... Uzbek is not a country I know anything about. I mean, other than an imaginary romantic past, what do I know about the present? Mika told me he remembered it having a civil war or something...Damn.. For others, Uzbek is more a "What?", "Where?".

Finally IX3's companion dropped me a short email... It went something like"... you missed out on the trip of your lifetime... 101 Arabic nites... stunning architecture ..." Ouch, I was not prepared for this. Salt on open wound... The old saying is true... No news may be actually good news..

This land feels like the motherland of civilisation, perhaps the most ancient in our world. People has been living here for thousands of years. Every corner hides a story waiting to be told. Stories of individuals and of great nations, bloody conquests and violent rebellions. This is a story of the origin of one of the most beautiful cities in Central Asia. And the extension of myself was there.

This lion/ human/ deer wall motif is really a strange sight. I thought Islam is not suppose to depict figurines??

If I am a traveller, arriving at these strange cities after seeing only endless sand dunes for weeks and months, what will be my reaction??

My first glimpse of civilisation after having survived the harshness of travels is of such grandeur and beauty. Will I break down and cry? Will I convert to Islam and wish to be protected against the dessert sands by these assuring walls?

How can.. how can anything be so achingly beautiful? How can such excessive detailing remain so subtle yet quietly stunning? There is no air of arrogance or pride even after having achieved so much... only a regal and majestic presence... This is beyond anything my architecture education has taught me. My extension of myself, you must be so honoured to touch and capture such greatness. E500, why was it not me to touch these walls... My heart ached...

E500's companions tell me that many of the roof details are made from paper mache technique. I need to seriously think about this.... E500, I trust you... not exactly your companions...

Perfect proportion

The pictures that they brought back - They feed my imagination. Images of harems of women cladded in colorful silk, resting in their balconies, overlooking the crowded marketplace below flash by my eyes. They say a picture tells a thousand words... my E500 is no doubt chatty.

E500 showed me the people he had eye contact with.

This is the restaurant E500's companions ate in...

This is the nice hotel E500 stayed in...

These must be the streets E500 walked by.... looks a bit shady in the evenings, I am glad you were not abducted.

Details

These are geometric and vegetal patterned glazed terracotta tiles, along with inscriptions using the Arabic Kufi and Maskhi scripts. The development of geometric patterns (girikh) coincided with the rise of mathematics and other exact sciences in the Muslim-Orient, which answers my initial questions on "How did they even construct these perfect close loop facades?" It did not take me long to find out that the builders did not only use maths and geometry in developing pattern systems, but also the overall proportions of structures to achieve the balance and oneness of it all.

Ancient verses Restoration

The left is original and the right is restored. To me it is a world of differences. The workmanship of the unrestored pillar is so fine as compared to the modern version on the right. Even a simple six petal flower in the center shows a remarkable lack of form in the latter. The actual kiln method to replicate the same cool blue tone of the terracotta facades are now lost.

FOOD

Cheese balls.. Hard cheese balls...

E500 doesn't eat but he say a good Uzbek bread should last for 3 years... I think his companions were not very impressed with its taste... Should have brought me a bread for souvenior...

Everyone raved about how sweet the honey dews were in Uzbek and how blissful it was to munch their teeth into its sweet flesh everyday. And typically, such greatness went unrecorded. No a single photo of the fabulous honey dews.. but dozens of shots of beans and parsleys and chillies.

... next stop, Kyrgyzstan

The Adventures of E500 and IX3 part 2

2011-11-01T00:58:00.000-07:00

This is Kyruyzstan.

Yawn. What a boring place....

Except the chinese temple which is actually a mosque...

Megan @9.5 months

2011-09-05T00:06:00.000-07:00

Megan has been a handful lately. Mobility is great for her, bad for our water feature or any feature she can reach. My eyeballs hurt watching her scramble around the house so we decided to take her to check out MBS...

...in the new dress that Mimi crochet for her...

She looks so pretty and happy in her new outfit that she could not stop smiling...

When Megan is happy, we are happy.

So the trip became all about taking close up photos with Megan...

... and watching her sleeve drop exposing her bare shoulders every now and then... Mimi, we need to work that one out!

Flower Problem

2011-08-05T00:37:00.000-07:00

IT department faced a flower problem one day....

A large blue flower grew above Sue's monitor... A toilet break later... another orange flower appeared from no where.

Soon flowers started popping out around her workstation... SCARY!!!

"What fertile soil I have", Sue exclaimed...

However, in the course of one morning, wild flowers grew out of control along IT lane..

Finance took a hit!
No one saw Shermin panicking. I think she tried to pretend the invasion above her pile of invoices did not exist...

Technical Terrance was not spared...
Crisis hit Precilia on Day 3 and she had to deal with a bunch of weird eyeballs right in front of her desk early morning...

The three tried to keep the flower situation under control but soon... with flowers came insects!

From the flight path, it is obvious, the problem AGAIN originate from Sue's area...

Attack of the Ladybugs! AHHHHH... HELPPPPPPP!!!

Attack of the butterflies! AAAAHHHHHH!!!

A poisonous fume came and apparently killed all the flowers one fine day.

All the insects died.

...makes me happy

2011-07-31T20:19:00.000-07:00

Walking pass Keppel Bay Tower and encountering beautiful flower arrangements in the lobby makes me happy...

Waking up to discover the flowers blossom a bright pink makes me happy...

Bringing the "kong" to da bao prawn noodle soup makes me happy....

Playing "Guess the animal" game with the guys during long boring meetings makes me happy...

Seeing Ken go yum yum at the Shirashi Special at Wisma Food Court makes me happy...

Walking into the house to hear Megan announce " MaMaMaMaMa" for the very first time makes me lagi happy!!!

Megan is a boy or a girl?

2011-07-22T02:27:00.000-07:00

So, is Megan a boy or a girl? Well, most people believe she is a boy.

Sleeps and shake leg like a boy.

Looks like a boy and as cheeky as destructive as a boy.

Watches soccer with daddy with the intensity of a little boy. Cheers to a goal like a boy.

When she is serious and stern, looks like grandpa.

Everything looks like food to Megan... drools and eats like a boy.

Can never keep still like a boy.

My mum in law insists Megan wear dresses in the day.

And Pink is the color of choice.

Hopefully in a dress, she will behave more like a girl.

Hey! Enough of these paparazzi shots ok! Take photo must pay money ok!!

Carpets

2011-07-07T02:51:00.000-07:00

I do not intend to blog about carpets... My whole mind is swimming with "stuff". Negative thoughts, bad people, bad policies, bad practices... omg I need to brush up on my vocabulary.. But in essence... BAD... BAD STUFF

I do not intend to blog about carpets but I cannot blog about bad people, bad people, bad practices and bad policies, bad people (aiyoh.. why I repeat bad people 3 times?) ... Well, not that I cannot but what is the point? Plus most likely I will just whine and whine and everyone reading it end up feeling depressed.

But I need to write to release some pent up emotions. So I shall blog about carpets.

I do not like carpets. Plus I always hated it when hotel designers give me the same old boring designs. Yawn. But... there are always talented individuals who manage to warm my heart and make me fall in love once in a while with beautiful creations... make me fall in love with carpets... Yes, for all of you not in the trade, carpets are designed if you have not noticed...

Carpets do not need to be boring... It can simply be a blue carpet... but WHAT a blue carpet!!!

Carpets set the mood for the space. Monochrome black and white but oh so strong and sexy. Furniture a bit sala but do you even notice?

I feel an intense love for this color green... Top flower a bit amateurish (still cute) while you can tell the bottom one is designed by an old hand... how can I get my hands on this??? Ahhh.... I am already feeling better and not so BAD...

I swear one day I will have one of these in one of my hotels... double egg yolk sum more.

Perfect.

I was going to use this pattern as a wall feature when I realised this is actually an LED carpet by LAMA Concept...

Really really, who says carpets cannot be interactive... Designed by mothers for kids. My bet.

Last but not least... a useful carpet... WOW.. I like.... where can I use this in?

And alrighti.. I am feeling so damn good now and I hope you guys as well.... Have a blast!

Parenting

2011-06-21T00:45:00.000-07:00

Just had a session with someone who was shocked that I did not bring Megan back home every single night of the weekday. Despite my explaination that Megan may be asleep by the time we finish work and we do not see it as a good practise to wake her up just to drive her home to sleep for the night, I was labeled as a bad mummy.

You must spend time to bond with your baby.
I don't think I am not bonding with the baby. We are bonding fine....
You should bring her home everynight! You also need to bond at night.
But she is sleeping. She is asleep by 8ish.
You know YY, the baby can bond with you even when she sleeps... she can feel your body warmth and recongise your scent... She should be WITH you...
Huh? Megan sleeps on her own in the other room... why does she need to sleep in our bed when she feels safe and secure in her own room?
That is the problem with you Singaporans. You give birth and you don't bond. You guys are working so you should not let Megan sleep so early... Let her sleep at 11 plus so that you have time to play with her after work... bonding bonding...
WAT?

Advertisments lie.
They protray insurance agents as people who listens to our needs. It feels quite the opposite when we spoke to an agent on our and Megan's insurance coverage. Ken could not convince her that what we really intend to get is a basic coverage because she (speaking with love and passion about her own very young daughter) feels that all parents should leave at least a million dollar legacy for their kids! Don't you love your daughter? Don't you want her to be well taken care off?

Yah Yah Yah.. It is exactly because I love her that I think she should learn how to earn her keep. And hmmmm not spending every minute of my off work hours with Megan does not mean that I do not love her. Yes kids are important but not soooo important that they need to consume my every breath of life...

If there is one thing I have learned since becoming a mother... is that parenting is extremely personal. Every parent has their very strong opionion on how to bring up their kids and outsiders' opionions are not always well recieved. Ken's and my mum have very different approaches to parenting as well. Who is to say which is better in the context of a different circumstance on a different kid? Even Ken and me do not always see eye to eye on this topic.

but at least both of us are clear on some things.

No sleeping at 11pm because mum and dad want to play with you. And sorry... no legacy...

Happy 6th Month Old!!

2011-05-19T00:57:00.000-07:00

Happy 6th month Megan!!

I remember the time when she started crawling in circles... then she started to crawl backwards when she wanted to reach an object in front of her... A week or so ago, she finally lift her heavy butt up and start coordinating her legs and arms. And suddenly, she advanced forward! Suddenly she can touch her care bear.. I think she noticed it too.. Because her eyes lit up and she turned her head to search for me for affirmation. "Did you see that!!!?" She laughed heartily.

I dropped everything and clapped my hands, praising her and encouraging her to move towards me... And she did!! And BOY!!! How extremely happy and proud she was... She could not stop practising the crawl and soon she was out of the mat, onto the floor. I called everyone to announce the big news. "hello hello.. Megan can CRAWL!!!"

This marks a new era.. the era of mobility. The end of our freedom.

She started on her rice cereals at 5 months and I don't think she really likes it. Nevertheless, she

now officially joins us at the dinning table during meal times. Our meal times I mean. NICE!

Oh yes, she started to teeth and feeding becomes difficult as her gums hurt and she has no appetite. But, count ourselves lucky she did not develop fever, only crankiness. Only grandma can handle her when she unleash her fury! WOW, tigress..

Who would have thought that 2011 elections is so damn exciting!?

Even Megan loves to watch the rallies

yes, you can so tell from her eyes that she has made up her mind which parties to support!

Of coz, watching daddy win puzzle fighter on the PSP is also Megan's favorite past time. I suspect Megan loves daddy more than me. I try not to be jealous... I try.

Grab Megan to pose for the blanket collection series that mimi made and my gal is a natural! However last photo looks like a "see, no pimple" shot! What is she thinking!!!!? Model for wrong product issit??!

I am such a egoistic mother... Ken and me recently love to bring the dumpling out for shopping trips on the weekends.. Ken wanted her to see more people and not be afraid of new faces.. I just LOVE hearing strangers praise her and fall in love w her... and I can carp on such " so cute" praises FOREVER...

What a loser...

Why did everyone ask me what I did to her hair??

Firstly, people will start by saying "he is so cute.."...

I will say "it's a she.."...

"a girl? what did you do to her hair? why cut like that??"

Sigh.... we did not cut her hair... and we are all concerned that her hair grew so slowly.. and .. grow like that. Grandma even applied hair tonic and literally watch Megan's hair grow everyday. She can actually call me and tell me " I think today a bit longer"... then in the evenings "Today this side more hair already hoh???" See? We are all trying our best to get her hair in order... AND.. she is NOT a boy

Bad Company

2011-05-08T22:38:00.000-07:00

I am distressed, devastated, crushed.

My backpacking kakis are packing their bags for Uzbekistan this June. I can swallow the fact that they leave for Laos without me one month before my wedding. I am ok with receiving a souvenir from their Tokyo trip last year. But. I cannot CANNOT forgive them heading out to Uzbekistan!!!! UZBEK!!! How do you even pronounce this country???

And why Uzbek? You gonna thank the jappy girl whom Ally discovered has visited India, Jordan, Morocco... fine.. I have no idea where this Jappy girl has visited. But the moral of the story is she has visited too many countries that they feel challenged or shall I say threatened on their street cred meter. To beat this jappy girl (although of coz no one is actually competing with them), Ally and Ix dished out three out-of-the-chart options - Sikkim, Xinjiang, Uzbekistan.

Me and Ally chose Xinjiang. Lx wanted Sikkim. Uzbek turned out to be the cheapest place to visit... SO it was decided... UZBEKISTAN...

Little dumpling is still young... of coz I can't backpack. So I am shutting out all these noise and chatter of their preparation. Friends are suppose to make you feel good.. Sigh... why did I have such bad company who make me feel... feel...how damn low my street cred meter is!

To my two beloved friends : Go mosque out and mutton out!

Animal Hairclips - we are in business

2011-04-18T20:09:00.000-07:00

From a tiny hairclip, I finally launch my business in children apparel and accessories. Ok website is still under construction but things are already flying off the shelves by word of mouth. I really need to get my act together and do this properly though because my delivery time now is so slooowww... hey guys, every stitch is sewn with tender loving care and I am not into commercial mass production ok...Bear with me in the meantine

Since Shanice's birthday, I have created more animals for the hairclips and everyone has been choosing and buying from me as gifts for their friends or children. Cindy wanted all the designs in one box for her little friend and Grace wanted hers individually packed- one for each child. In the end, I standardized two types of packaging - the box and the cards.

Busy busy busy but happily busy. Friends showed me photos of their kids wearing the animal hairclips and oh they look so striking and sweet! Sigh, this is why I am in business.

Shanice One Year Old Birthday

2011-04-08T01:28:00.000-07:00

Stacey's little gal is already one year old! wow... time flies.... In a hurry to attend the birthday bash, hence only have time to make some little stuff for Shanice... Am impressed with how cute these little hairclips and hairbands turn out that I think I will make more of those...

Having a baby girl is so fun!

Made all of these while watching "Ai" on TV... Of coz, everytime I sew a button or an eye, I have to show Megan. "You like this color Megan? Brown button with yellow petals?" Got to make her feel part of the process else she will grab my attention in other ways.... Basically, smile means approval. No smile means approval as well.

Hope Stacey and Shanice like the little present. Team effort from Megan and Mummy.

Back at Work

2011-04-08T01:27:00.000-07:00

Lipid Yoo, de Thunder Thighs is back at work! Mother and child separation anxiety? You mean me or her?
All of a sudden my slow life of baby sitting and watching TV is no more. Time becomes a precious commodity as everyday zooms by... Megan continues to grow stronger and healthier and she is no longer satisfied with lying down... Sit up, she insists! She has master the art of flipping over multiple times and she is extremely delighted with this new found skill...

After the news of an infant suffocating while sleeping face down, I am a bit concerned with Megan sleeping alone in the other room as she tends to flip in the middle of the nite. Ken is out stationed for a week plus so Megan now sleeps with me. Last Sunday I was woken up by her at 9am. I opened my sleepy eyes and there she is with her round head just above my left cheek, saliva dripping down my neck... Somehow she has managed to flip and crawl and wake her sleepy mummy up! Such a sweet way to start a day.

Old photo - so funny, like she notice a bee land on her nose.

It's here because I dont know why I did not blog it previously!

Lx and Ally says I never reply their emails on how to make Botero goddess a Botero Goddess. Ask me "to stop admiring my own creation/ thinking ways of how to improve this version 2.... which can go on forever..." I must warn Megan to avoid this uncle and auntie next time! Still dare ask me to bring my 7kg little dumpling for a "backpacking" trip somemore... who carry?

The divers came over to visit and had a grand time with the happy one.... Play play play.... Mok was supposed to exhibit his nanny skills but Kat end up carrying her. Bestest friend still not married.. What is wrong with this guy!? Kyra at 3+years can name almost all the fishes on TV - Manta ray, barracuda, puffer etc... Alvin tot Megan is a boy!!! Anyway, I suspect they all come to show off to me footage of their recent layang layang dive trip.... make me jealous only... sigh... where did i hang my fins?

March is gone and I need to plan for April or else it will disappear before my very eyes!

Things to do in April:
1. Stretch
My body is stiff! Yani says I must stretch and I will. Note to myself - stretch everyday. ok gym at least once a week... Corrine's mum is buying me some Malay massage cream - can bust cellulite! YEAH!!! Lipd Yoo the Thunder Thigh NO MORE!!!

2. Bake one batch of Pecan sandies

How about that brownie peanut butter cups stuff I say I was going to bake in Jan? Errr... yah err.. this recipe looks easier! hahaha... Cross my heart... I will at the very least use my brand new 16months old oven this April. Die Die will bake... oh ok.. instruction says I need a blender... hmmm I don't have a blender... ok maybe this will be Dec's project... hhahaha

3. Limit energy usage
Internet forums are full of comments by sporeans condemning nuclear plants because of the Japanese incident. I think they are missing the point. Nuclear reactors are a but a consequence of human's insatiable need for energy. The key is to use energy responsibly. This planet for our kids is already looking bleak and we are sitting here shaking leg in aircon room and saying that is japan's problem... April is the month I want to encourage (ok nag) people I know to live responsibly...

4. Printing story book one for Megan
Completed the drawings and in process of coloring... Here is a sneak peek on page one.

Megan's A-Z Animal Chart completed

2011-03-11T04:01:00.000-08:00

It's finally completed. Ok its completed a long time ago but its finally blogged! Megan is of coz way too young to pronounce ABC but its ok, I will pronounce for her! She will just have to look where my finger goes.

Now for the makings of the chart:

I have decided on a deep red fabric as a base. Alphabets shall be cut out from lighter patterned fabrics. Dry lay looks great despite a few mistakes here and there! Love the color combi. Throughout the whole process, Megan has been patiently lying in her bouncing chair watching me. She loves to watch me sew and draw beside her.

Now where are all the animals? Gonna sort out them all out and begin the difficult process of sewing Velcro to their backs. I have thought long and hard on how to make it easy for Megan to stick all the animals to the chart. (weather she sticks them in the correct order is another issue altogether) Have experimented on hooks and transparent pockets but Velcro is the best solution.

Opps sorry, miss out animal Z.

Ok, dry lay everything again. geee.... something is wrong. Bright and colorful yes but my eyes do not know where to rest. This is way too complicated with too many colors trying to grab my attention. The lighter letters are jumping out too much, overpowering the animals... Bad bad bad for Megan's developing eyesight.

Ok, discard all the lighter color letters and try again with all the medium tone ones... Ha, much better. The alphabets now resides into the background. No doubt this scheme looks less exciting and cherry but it's more focused. Ok, will decide to proceed with this one.

The reason why I have not been able to blog the chart is because I wanted a big cute button to finish off the pocket on the chart's top left corner and until now I still have not bought it. Never mind, blog first... This pocket is to store progress sheets. 4 out of 26 correct. 22 out of 26 correct!

Sorry, my model is not in a good mood these days and refuse to pose with a smile. My ex-boss, AM asked me to seriously consider putting all these into production and yah yah yah.... I am looking into it, boss!!

Post Opt Care

2011-03-10T22:32:00.000-08:00

If you think the three days in KK for Megan's operation was traumatic? You ain't seen nothing yet. Welcome to the weeks of post opt care and the grumpy Megan.

Part 1

Megan is finally home and four of us are in charge of looking after her. That means feeding her nasty tasting medications every few hours. Removing the tape from her philtrum and cleaning the wound after every feed. Removing and re-bandaging her arm for a breather every now and then but make sure her itchy fingers do not rub her nose! And bathing her with or without her bandages. Wow!

The first thing to do once we reached home is feeding and medicine time. That means wound cleaning time too! Its approaching 3pm and none of us has had lunch yet. But that would have to wait.

A 6.5ml medicine takes approx 13 rounds of syringe feeds and Megan hated the taste of both antibiotics and paracetamol. Or maybe she simply hates force feeding. So she only has one response - cry.

After finishing the milk, Ken would carry Megan round and round the house, activating the mobiles, lights, everything and anything that could distract Megan from her loud wails. I would be holding the syringes giving chase behind, seeking every opportunity to squeeze some nasty fluid into her mouth. "Don't let her cry too much, it's bad for the stitches", Joan's words rang in my mind. Great! We have not even reached the painful part yet. Spin round and round... I always get a bit dizzy after all these chase...

After draining all the medicine into her mouth, Ken will calm her down while I prepare to clean her wound. By the time Ken set her at the changing station for me to proceed to step 2, Megan would be all smiley. I would start by standing at her head and Ken at her feet holding her body with his elbows and head with his palms... ok baby, soon you wont be smiling.

First, remove the old bandage and tape... Ouch ouch ouch... The tape tears from her cheeks and before I even begin, tears have started. Damn the tape for being so sticky! By the time I actually start cleaning her stitches, Megan would have brought her cries up to another level. (You can actually hear her screams from the basement carpark) At this point, everyone who was responsible for holding her down will do exactly the same thing that evidently caused huge distress to me... They will let go of Megan's head and try to pat her in a failed attempt to calm her down... Immediately Megan would shake of her head left and right vigorously, making it impossible to aim and clean. Once the elbow grip is gone, Megan will also certainly start kicking the chest of whoever is previously holding her down... chaos has descended.

My clumsy efforts at cleaning and the oh-so-difficult task of taping the gauze down tightly enough to prevent obstructing her breathing cause Megan major discomfort and likewise whoever is witnessing my act. I would have to tear out everything and redo all over again. There would be screams and tears, struggles and kicks, flying tempers and distress... What a mess. This is so different from the controlled enviroment of the hospital.

When it is finally over. Megan would collapsed in bed from sheer exhaustion, I will evidently break down, hide at a corner and sob uncontrollably. Soon, both Ken and me would head to the kitchen for much needed alcohol. And the proportion of vodka gets higher and higher... "will she remember and hate us?", Ken asked me... sigh...

By right the wound should have healed and not painful after days but Megan has developed a phobia of me standing behind her when she is lying down. She will always strain her neck to look at me with those pleading eyes, as if painfully asking me " mummy are you going to hurt me?" You start to see fear in her eyes as she searched for any sign of cotton swaps... I will always pretend to be jovial and make funny faces, when actually the lump in my throat has almost choked me. But there is no hiding from my little one. The moment she see me lift my hands, her crying took on a desperate urgency. Her eyes will still be logged onto me begging me to stop.... and I have not even started. I wish the deepest wish that she will stop staring at me. "look at daddy, look at daddy", I tell her but she hardly allow me to forget it is me who chose to inflict pain onto her even when she begged.

7 days, 42 sessions of such torture drained the life out of Megan and all the adults. We thought the worst was over after her stitches were removed a week later. No more medications, no more cleaning. No more crying.

Part 2

Megan received her 5 in 1 immunisation jabs 9 days after surgery. OMG, it made her cranky beyond my wildest dreams. Instead of wailing every 3hour intervals like before, she now cries for hours and hours. I became busy beyond words, carrying her around and cleaning up her vomits and diarrhea from the living room to the bedrooms to all over my body... Ken was outstationed and my MIL cannot help because she herself just had her cataract operation and for a month she cannot carry heavy things and yup, Megan is heavy. OMG... OMG... "yup yup Megan, mummy is here, don't you worry!"

I know her discomfort is not cleft related but in desperation, I called CCRC for help. CCRC is the best thing that happened to our family. From Dr Vincent all the way down to the nurses, they hold the belief that cleft patients require long term care so we were encouraged to call them if we faced any problem even if it has nothing to do with cleft, be it physical or emotional all the way until Megan turns 18.

Two days later I called again to request for a PD because Megan was still cranky. "you can bring her down to the children's emergency but it does not sound that serious plus you must wait, why don't you come down to CCRC and we will look at her first. If need be then we help you register downstairs..." Fantastic! Love you Josephine and Joan.

I must never forget the help that CCRC rendered us. Joan spent almost an hour with us trying to figure out Megan's problems and going through our feeding, sleeping, carrying patterns, checking all medications Megan has taken to make sure she covered all grounds that can possibly make Megan uncomfortable while Josephine check on the Megan's bottles and tits and told us we over sterilise the tits. These guys are busy to the core everyday and yet out of love and goodwill, they helped and its all without charges... I really really have to give something back one of these days... maybe do volunteering work for CCRC.

Megan is once again good and happy and gaining weight. And when she is happy, we are happy!

Megan's First Counting Book

2011-03-10T21:51:00.000-08:00

Since Megan got her A-Z chart already, I thought she is now ready for her 1-10 counting book! (did I hear someone say I am a kiasu parent? hello hello?) Anyway, I am desperate to use up the scraps of felt left over from the previous projects.

Here it goes. Say hello to the mini me - Yoo Eng Chia from St Nicholas Girl's Sch Doll, still with the name tag on!

1 flower for my darling... this is the first page I did so is the most elaborate. Since I am still extremely excited.

2 pink booties make a pair.

3 toothbrushes in a glass. The good thing about making your very own counting book is customisation. My galfriend told me that her daughter does not like to brush teeth so to lessen the impact of a toothbrush entering Megan's life, I have decided to brainwash her NOW by introducing daddy's toothbrush, mummy's toothbrush and Megan's toothbrush!! See? Everyone brushes their teeth!

4 slices of watermelons. Just in case I have a second one by the time Megan learns to count. One for didi or meimei as well! Must cultivate the virtue of sharing.

5 color pencils! Sorry, no story to spin coz government says stop at two... (ok that was ages ago but hey! Government did say, stop at two)

6 shining stars! Alamak, Ken flipped to this page and started laughing!!! ok, gonna fix that one. You know I am not good at Math!

7 butterflies...

8 hearts. This is one of the last few pages I did and as you can tell, this is getting SSOO boring. Why the hell did I decide to do a counting book? I bet I can buy one outside for 10 bucks!

9 sweets. Ok folks, I really do not wish to do sweets as this is not an item I wish my little one to recognise that early in life... Like I say, I ran out of ideas and patience plus eight is a large number!!!

10 different types of cups! Hurray! Finally finish, bind the pages together and there you go Megan, start learning to count 1 - 10!!!!

Primary Cleft Operation

2011-02-20T07:02:00.000-08:00

My sweet darling,

We checked you into KK on the afternoon of Valentine's day. It was the only other day besides new year and Xmas that single bed wards are not 100% occupied. Ah yes we enquired about the hospital ward occupancy rate. Haha

Mummy overpacked everything needed for the 3 day stay as usual. One bagful for you (and many bagfuls for ourselves!! Oops) - Books were essential just in case daddy and mummy feel bored enough to actually read. Lee Kuan Yew Hard Truths to keep Singapore Going for daddy and The Far Side Gallery 3 for mummy. (yes, mummy is more shallow, cant read auto bio on serious pple who take themselves too seriously) Blue SQ cotton booties for daddy and Maroon AC booties for mummy plus many many twisters/ cheezels/ MnMs/ fruit juice/ chocolate milk to stock the minibar. Daddy said its embarrassing to display all the chips on the console table as if we are here to holiday... errr... ok...

You were full of smiles when mummy prep you on tomorrow... I knew you understand in your own way and you take it in your stride. My Megan is a tough cookie. Your operation is at 10.15am tomorrow hence you were to start fasting by 5.30am. This was my biggest worry because you cannot, simply cannot go hungry. Your cries has always been devastating even with the slightest delay in feeding time.

15th Feb 2011

Surgery will last for 2 hours and we were encourage not to wait but head out for breakfast. I dragged daddy for a 40min foot reflex massage to release his tension. He was limping like an old man and I was sure, like mummy, he felt like one as well. Daddy being daddy as you know him was so worried that he will miss fetching you from the theatre that he kept saying no no no. In the end, it did not matter if the foot reflex is good or bad, my objective was achieved when daddy fell asleep halfway through the session.... How tired he must be.

Back outside OT, we waited for the nurse to call us in. Since only one family member could enter, mummy waited outside with other anxious parents while daddy fetched you out. Alone and not knowing what to do, I people watch and weep when other parents weep as their own child were being wheeled out.... It was very quiet at the waiting area and I tot I could hear my own heartbeat... It was not a very nice feeling..

Mummy always believe I am the cool cucumber while daddy is the worried wart but when I saw your face as you came out, I could not stop crying. I had zero idea what I was crying for. Mummy is never particular about looks, hence when I knew you had cleft before you were born, it is not an important concern... I could not imagine that others may see you differently or that you may be in anyway disadvantaged in future... When you were born, you looked wonderfully adorable. The cleft was such a small small thing, hardly need fixing.

But I have never imagine the sharp pain I would come to feel when I heard innocent comments of young children who pointed at your lips and go "why is her lip like that?". You are now still so young, such words may mean nothing but once you begin to understand that your friends around you see you differently, such words will leave an emotional scar that may not be easily forgotten. This operation is important to you thus it is important to mummy and daddy. From this moment onwards, Megan, you become normal.

The sight of your numerous stitches and dried blood around your mouth and gown shreded my heart into pieces... It was a pain I had never felt before I became a mother. It really hurts. I was quite taken aback when I see stitches on your nose. I did not anticipate a surgery on your pretty ordinary nose. And to fix a tiny cleft lip on your right, they actually cut and stitch all the way up from the affected lip to the right nostril. I simply could not stop tearing as me and daddy followed behind your bed as you were being wheeled back to the ward.

The nurses were all waiting for you to be fully awake to begin feeding but you slept for most of the day as if you were totally exhausted. The first time you opened your eyes and saw us, you gave us a wide smile and suddenly felt the pain and began crying..

Sister Joan, the staff nurse from Cleft and Craniofacial Center (CCRC) told me to bottle feed you before she returned to teach me how to clean your wound. "Won't it hurt for her to drink from a bottle with a fresh lip wound?"... Her reply was the same as Vincent. When you are hungry, you will drink. And it was true, you took to the bottle like fish to water, sucking away, smearing blood all over the rubber tit.

Me and your grandpa were in the ward when sister Joan returned to give me a scary lesson on wound cleaning, executed after every 3hrly feed. Joan demonstrated to me once on how to roll the saline dipped cotton stick into your nostril and wipe the internal stitches clean of blood and mucus. Then your philtrum and your outer lip into your inner lip.

It is hard wrenching just watching Joan clean and you screaming away. Mummy had never heard you cry so loudly and urgently before. It was much much worse when Joan wanted me to take over. That was the first time mummy had to confront the rawness of your wound in its every detail. I could imagine why your cries are inconsolable but my visibly trembling hands were so clumsy that for a moment I felt angry. Why? Why me? You guys could so obviously tell that I was not adequate for this job and I would cause you unnecessary pain!?

"Hold the head, steady your hands.... no no no too gentle, I show you. Look at the edge of the cut, you have to press the cotton bud down.. like this, and roll in a zig zag manner... press hard and even out the two flesh so they can join properly.. see, press and roll and even the flesh, squeeze out the blood and discharges... darling how well the philtrum wound heals depend on how well you even out the stitches ok... the nose stitches need to be clean properly too because if there are clots, the fresh will tear when stitches are removed... press harder yes...try again, press harder"

To clean your wound required two person. One to hold you down and steady your head and body and one to do the cleaning and bandaging. All this time while I were practising cleaning, doing it wrongly and repeating the action, you were screaming and shaking vigorously. I knew in an instant I am no nurse material but I had to do it. My mind was a total blank trying to block out your cries but this was no leg wound where I could visually ignore your painful expression ... I saw your face turning from red to maroon to purplish... deep breathe YY... suck it in YY, finish it quickly YY, I told myself... I could do it..I could do it (like I had a choice)... The crying, blood and gauze were too much for grandpa so he went away for a breather. Mummy was by myself, inflicting this pain onto you with nurses telling me to press harder harder...

Other than your facial bandage, your arms were braced with timber flats and secured with gauze. You looked like you broke both limps but this was to prevent your hands from touching your face during the healing process. Tubes and braces were attached to your feet for the IV and painkiller drips. I knew this was yet another painful area because it would hurt when you jerk your leg and shifted the inserted needle. You were truly a brave one, my love.

Daddy took the night shift again for the second time. He told me the nurses could not stop your cries and he had to cuddle you to sleep..

16 Feb 2011

The day of your discharge... Hurray Megan..

Walked over to CCRC where sister Joan wanted to see how competent mummy was at cleaning your wound before we head home. Daddy and mummy chated with a grandma who was waiting to see Joan as well. Her 10 month old grand daughter just had her palette operation a week before and they were back to clean the wound. She told us that not only did the plastic surgeons at CCRC fix the infant's palette, they also reconstructed her eustachian tube which was beyond what they anticipated the operation will achieve. In fact, they did not even know there was something wrong with the child's Eustachian tube. Same for you my darling, we thought the operation was for your lips only but Vincent took the initiative to enlarge and reshape your right nostrail so that both nostrails now look exactly the same as well. Vincent and his team really went the extra mile.

Mummy wanted you to know that you had been a very brave gal Megan. Much much braver than mummy. Mummy has recording down every detail of this ordeal with photographs so that one day when you are older, you can read about how very very fortunate and courageous you were...

Love you from daddy and mummy.

Chinese New Year 2011

2011-02-20T00:15:00.000-08:00

Day One - Mummy and Megan in Pink. YY in pink! Unbelieveable... honestly I dont look too bad in color!!!

Day Two - Retro theme... layered dress and poka dots!

Day Three - no more clothes to coordinate! Yup.

Megan's Rattle Rattle

2011-02-08T01:09:00.001-08:00

Megan has started to grab my hair and everything that she can reach. She gets really frustated with an object is too far for her tiny hands to grab. Ok. Time for mummy to make her a new toy!

Was at the library and read that toys that make sounds when they are shaken are good for the development of kids. It makes them understand simple concepts like cause and effect. I shake this, it will make a sound. Nice! Megan gonna learn this concept!

Rattle Rattle! Yup I spent a morning patiently sewing this for the now not so little, little one.

First and foremost, like all toys for babies, prewash all materials because everything they hold goes into their mouths. These colorful felt are the same ones leftover from the animal chart.... Daiso felt last a long way!!! Mix and match the colors and sew them up with strong tread since kids these days are pretty strong and tend to tear everything apart!!

Stuff the rattle with foam and two bells and stitch up the gap. TADA! A simple little rattle rattle for my Megan is completed... Love it! The size is just nice for her tiny hand and not too heavy.

Now that Megan has her rattle rattle.... I shall see how she applies her new found knowledge of cause and effect (say next week!). Megan drinks milk slowly, mummy will have late lunch.... Megan drinks faster, mummy eats on time! Hahaha.... cause and effect!!!! My life shall get better soooooonnn...

Daily Life

2011-02-08T01:09:00.000-08:00

I dig the concept of SLOW life... although I cannot do it. SLOW life is so hip and sustainable... so enviromentally friendly... Now that I am kinda stuck at home watching paint dry and baby grow... I guess this is the phyiscal form of me living a slow life... ok not so hip... but but quite alright.

Remember the golden seeds Ken planted last year? The top left photo shows the grown seedling in Feb 2010 and flower in oct 2010. Today, slightly more than one year later... a red pepper chili larger than my palm is harvested, Urban farming... slow life...

Our other plant, Calla lily has grown so much flowers that non of us is very excited or care that much anymore...

Resumed cooking new recipes and refining old ones...Thumbs up for my hot and sour Sinigang, tom yam steam boat and prawn paste steamed huai san (chinese yam). With so much time at home, it is not hard to surf the web for recipes and try to make it work.

Megan at 2.5 months old is very active... Usually I leave her to do her morning excerise on her own (right leg up, down, left leg up, down, both legs up! down). Afternoon is delicated to mum and daughter heart to heart talk where I listen to her tell me long "ah geh ah geh" stories. I have stopped breastfeeding and Megan has in desperation bit Ken's nose and suck hard when he bent over to kiss her. She got a mouthful of oil and blackheads in return and Ken had a great laugh.

One more month and my slow life will come to an end as I return back to office. I wonder other than making baby craft, do I still remember anything about hotels?

My Two Months Old Megan

2011-01-24T21:23:00.000-08:00

I was reminded that I have not been updating my blog for a long long time... sorry guys, was really busy with my new found freedom (after I outsource Megan to my inlaws!!) and there is no turning back! At least for a while...

Megan is 2! (2 months that is) and I can happily declare - its all worth it! Maybe it is because the attachment has finally "attached", or I am more familar and better with her habits and schedule, or she simply gets easier to look after... All is good. All is good. Now lets check on my latest iPhone photos...

Left : That is Megan at one month

Right : This is Megan at two months... fat and heavy! And of course, the daddy gets more and more exhausted! hahaha...

She has developed sturdy lotus limps and she can deliver a strong kick...So we dressed her up for boxing and let her stretch her arms and kick her legs! Just look at her fat tummy while she is at it!!

At two months, Megan loves to "talk"... I love the interaction as oppose to the monolog in the first month but very soon I run out of topics. Her grandpa ran out of topics even faster than me, exclaiming to Megan last week, " dont talk to me, I dunno what to tell you... talk to your grandma, she always has a lot to say! no no no, dont talk to me.."

Andrea fared better...She can have a conversation with Megan for an hour and it goes like this:

Megan : ah ger.. ah ger.. duhhh... arr.. acerrr

Andrea : Yes, ah I understand, then what happened?

Megan : Hmmm err..

Andrea : Ah! Is that true? Oh wow... what did you do?

Megan : darrr.. ah gerr ah gerr... ehhh.... errr ahh... (2 mins pass)... ah geerrrr geerrr... *yawn* cerrr ar ah ger ah gerr (5 mins pass) duhh ah gerr ah gerr

Andrea : Your story very long... are you thirsty?

Megan : Ah gerrr.. geerrr arr duh..

Andrea : Oh you are now telling me what happened last week ah? You finished the part on yesterday...

Yes and she spends the rest of her waking hours playing and laughing. Even when her daddy is busy with work at home, she can still be cheeky and playful. It is tiring in a different way.

Good thing she sleeps well both in sarong and in bed... Now she only wakes up once in the night instead of 3 times! hurray!

This is how you Burp! You can sit her on your lap or prop her over your shoulder...

Oh yah, not to mention, she cries feriously as well...

Megan baby talk

2011-01-23T19:32:00.000-08:00

*All photos are taken around 4th week, just before her one month old celebration.

1.5 months and Me

2011-01-04T19:13:00.000-08:00

Finally I am more in tune with Megan's schedule (I am being controlled by a kiddo!!!) plus my body is getting more accustomed to fatigue from waking up at night.

How did my aki friends manage their babies before I came along? Ah! They have an advantage. Being architects, they are already so exhausted that their brains simply did not register their bodies crashing (again). Bad profession, great training for motherhood.

Haha... sorry no more baby photos in this blog... PLEASE!!! She looks exactly the same!!! Except a bigger heavier head giving me a sprained wrist.

At 1.5 months, I can now manage to make more elaborate breakfast for everyone after Megan's 6am feed, do laundry, bath & massage Megan, excerise, watch DVD, cook myself a light lunch and decent dinner for everyone. Yes plus email/ blog/ do "personal stuff" all in one day. Multi tasking, multi tasking.... tiring but do-able. If my in-laws come in the afternoons, I get to catch up on some sleep as well...

Its 2011. Must plan what to do to add variety to my life... I cannot be bored.

First and foremost, need to get Xianger's apartment done. Friend of 25 years, when she needs help on design and renovation of her new place, can I say no? Plan, design, discuss, measure, draw, detail etc... gotta really manage my time... luckily no need to coordinate, just shove it down Jeffery's throat... Drew a few options to start discussion... Ha, life is interesting again...

My oven has never been used. Time to use it... I should bake something since I have always wanted to learn baking. How about this? Brownie Peanut Buttercups! Got all the ingredients ready... one day... one day...

Saw this on the internet. Ha! Is this knitting or patchwork? Sooo Cute! Megan needs a bag! Shall I do one for her? She needs a pencilcase too! Similar design with a zip? Time to activate my virgin sewing machine somewhere in the storeroom! Do I knew how to use a sewing machine? No... but wat the hell... cant be that hard...

hahahah... ok better finish up Xianger's house coz promised to send Jeff and her all the plans and elevations by next week... DAMN... too many things to do.... way too many things to do...

18th Dec 2010 - Megan's One Month

2010-12-21T19:57:00.000-08:00

Its official. Today, Megan turns one month and we are having a party. What should she wear? No worries, I am going to groom her to be a SPURS fan, Ken said. A parcel arrived and wow, wat a mega decent Jersey! Only problem is the fabric is not stretchable and Megan's head almost got stuck. I mean it got stuck, for a while at least...

What is a party without invitation cards? Since I have been boring my brains out, might as well do some craft work! I tot my card looks great but he cant tell what the graphic was about. DUH....so not a designer. And of coz, we din manage to send out the cards... hahah...where got time?? This is what you call, make for the sake of making it. Honestly I should set up a shop.

What can I give the little kids who are coming? More felt toys, because my secret stash is limited to daiso felt. Made little pink hearts for the girls and shiny yellow stars for the boys! Filled party packs with sweets and chocolates as well...Hmm... I did mention I was bored right?

Apparently everything was sitting on the table and we forgot to distribute them when guests swarmed in. So sorry if we missed anyone out (your kids I mean). And we have no photo records of the party either coz we were too busy to use the camera. What a waste.

Megan received so many angbaos and presents and got cuddled by (read hijacked) so many caring aunties and uncles that she remains very wide awake that nite. Oh do not misunderstand that I have reservations that Megan was being hijacked around. I WELCOME IT!!! We had a great time unwrapping Megan's gifts the next day! hahaha. I tot baby stuff are generally quite standard but wow some of these stuff are really interesting and "new" to me.

Diaper Cake - Made to look like a cake with diapers as cake fillings. Dresses, mittens, socks and toy as icing and cake deco. Check out the close up "flowers" of the cake, made with rolled up mittens and socks... clever clever.

Luckily we heed Zhihao's advice and not buy baby clothes since many people will give... How true. Megan now at one month has more clothes than me, which totally inspire me to go shopping for myself soon... Love the white dress with pale grey poker dots. Who would have tot my much despised poker dots can look this cool!? And soft pastel pink clothes look so sweet... OK I have decided that pink shall be Megan's new black. Maybe I will buy sum pink dresses myself!!!

I dig this floral flock but when I placed them with the rest of the clothes, it did look on the small side. Better let Megan wear this soon else the lifespan is going to be real short. She will look so sweet!

Oops... hahah sorry, this pose is no good... hahaha *sweat* quite unladylike... oh that stomach

This photo looks much better...

Bedtime Musical Box - A most intriguing gadget. The sleeping bear on the crescent moon sways about to soft changing lights and lullaby music designed to totally capture the attention of any baby lying in bed but refusing to sleep. Sweet. If the baby still can't be pacified by turning the head away, not a problem. Because it comes with a projector that project a galaxy of moving stars onto the ceiling as well. A design that die die must get the attention. Oh yeah and the images rotate so fast that it is bound to make the kiddo giddy and sedated. Even if she does not sleep, she won't cry..

A box of socks- Extremely fashion! I also wan...

Little Squirts Bath Toys - Never tot that bath toys can be anything other than the yellow rubber duckie. I am blown away with these "think out of the box" rubber ram, rubber bunnie, rubber cow etc...

The Melt My Heart Shoes -

I mean melt my heart, since Megan is too young to know anything anyway.... Soooo pretty..... Do they come in adult size?

20+ days and counting

2010-12-21T18:55:00.000-08:00

Time flies... Megan and my confinement is almost nearing one full month.

No. That statement is half an outright lie. It is 20 plus days and counting but time does not fly. In fact, time has never trickled so slowly in my life.

If every minute of my everyday recurs an infinite number of times, it is a horrifying prospect. And confinement does feel like that with its relentlessness crushing me down, drowning me till I cannot breath. I cannot see the end or most likely I may not make it till salvation comes.

Alright. Above will be how this blog will sound if I were to write this blog during the thick of my confinement but I am actually writing this after the worst is over and feeling quite positive, I cant quite get back to that depressive mood for blogging. DAMN! Not that I wish for a return to one of the most difficult times of my life as it was an emotionally roller coaster ride with few highs but many a times running off rail and crashed into the tree nearby. I simply seek to record the times in its essence.

Friends who have not given birth before always envy the four months mat leave, imaging me flipping magazine and eating chocolates while holding Megan to one breast. Yah rite Buddies! People expect a happy glowing mother and no one talks about the dark side of this responsibility. Only when I probe did most of my galfriends feel resentment.

Now now now... Lets me recall my top 5 confinement lows:

1. Confinement literally
Stuck within a space of 1200sft facing four walls when I am so used to travelling and backpacking is my number one killer. My only window out of this tiny world is the TV which is not showing my fav Air Crash Investigation. Plus there is only this many times one can watch the re-run of House or read how Hatsumomo tried to snub Sayuri. No social interaction damaged my brain cells so much I must have died from boredom over and over again.

2. Breastfeeding
Enough said

3. Unsolicited well meaning advices
Extremely stressful and one is in not much position to brush them off. When the wife is stressed, she gives it to the husband.

4. Confinement Food
Pork, liver, kidney, pancreas, stomach, ginger, soup, fish, apple, wolfbery, red date tea plus funny chicken all cooked with sesame oil (dunno why) repeated in approx 200 dishes over 30 days.

5. Fatigue
No need to explain how lack of sleep further damages brain cells and make me cranky.

Aiyah, I dont like a blog without photos so lets jump straight into the picture gallery!

Looking after a baby is hectic work.

There are of course happy moments. I wont go to the extend to say that a smile from Megan makes everything worth it but Luckily Megan is a sweet baby.

When Megan is wide awake and wants to play, she is quite fun.

Megan getting excited and stretching her lotus root limbs, which is like all the time...Look! Long torso, short legs!

Megan showing off her long tongue. Oh did I mention that the fortune master at KK said that Megan's future career is ideally a judge or a lawyer. Gee... looks like I have been watching too much three kingdom n hanging out with the legal lane people too much during my pregnancy.

The many ways which Megan can sleep - even with her arms frozen in midair.

Megan when she is tired and frowning and I had to wrap her up. I finally understand the true meaning of "a bundle of joy". It literally means that when babies are bundled up and cant move their limbs, limiting their crankiness, they can indeed be quite a joy.

The many expressions of Megan

2010-11-30T18:08:00.000-08:00

Megan is growing bigger and stronger... Wish I could weigh her but my house has no weighing machine... in other news, am not sure how much weight I have lost in this 2 weeks as well...

She does not want to sleep in the mornings now, just want to open her big wide eyes to search for someone to play with her.

The house is filling up with so many Megan's little toys and belongings.... Hey guys, dun buy anymore...

Depression

2010-11-30T05:56:00.000-08:00

I was pondering over the title of the previous blog - The Truth and Nothing but the Truth... many people who read the blog told me it was really funny and all are happy that I am doing well... Lets just say "the real truth" changes with the ever changing situation that is Life.

Blogging/writing let me sort out my thoughts. I need to rationalise every event from the overwhelming soup in my brain to make writing make sense. Hence as I write, I feel more cheerful knowing that all my problems have been compartmentalised and simplified. From the time I start a blog to the time I finish/post (which may be days later), my mood may already be different from the content. You dont actually want to read about me whine and getting all emo rite?

Being a new mother is mentally and physically tough. No woman other than those who very recently delivered before you will tell you that. Talk to mothers of older kids on difficulty you encounter, their answers will usually be "no leh, I dont have that problem leh". Either these experienced mums have long forgotten what it feels like or .. or watever.... It is distressing and in comparison makes struggling mums like me feel starkly incompetent. Having a new baby is like being thrown into the deep sea which you have to work out how to survive. I worry about Megan not drinking enough, worry about me not producing enough milk to meet her demand, worry about me having enough milk but maybe I am not feeding her properly hence I am taking this long and she continues to cry... try and error try and error.

Breastfeeding Megan is indeed a wonderful bonding experience I value and when its not working well, I actually feel like a failure. Breastfeeding is demanding, time consuming, tiring and difficult difficult difficult. The whole world conspire against non breastfeeding mothers or maybe people like me just feel the guilt of not doing enough.... only good friends will tell u its ok, that kids who grow up with formula are good and healthy as well. only good friends will tell you they face exactly the same difficulties as you, try slowly. Breastfeeding is not without pain. Breast massage before feeding is not without pain. Breast engorgement is not without pain. Pumping is not without pain....

Days with rashes are killing me. They spread with such ferociousity that it is no use pretending to be calm about it. I was desperate for a cure for my itch but every bloodly doctor told me its hormonal and there is nothing to be done so I shall not be a whiner and suck it in... My daily comfort of post nat massage sessions on my ever aching body have to discontinue because massage makes the rashes spread even faster.... As fast as my "disease" come, life's little comforts are taken away from me.... It is hard not to feel depressed...

I am worried about my possible immune system malfunction. It may be a passing phrase or alter my life forever. At this moment I only want my itch and rashes to subside to lift my moods.

A Chinese confinement is not the easiest thing to go through even in a home resort. Well meaning restrictions like no showering, eating only a small range of vegetables, lean pork and pork's kidney, liver and stomach and fish ONLY for the first 12 days, covering up to prevent catching wind etc.. It is not that any single thing is very hard to do or that I disagree with doing them. But when bundled all of them together plus a C sec wound, itchy rashes, fatigue, leaking breasts, blood discharges, managing a baby and movement restricted to an apartment... YES confinement is not easy to go through at all...

Focus on the positive, Everything will pass...

Every small practical tip is a comfort and very much needed. SC has been good to me on this. She will tell me things like this is Megan's expression when she is going to do this. This is how to calm her down... Such is real help I need to build up my confidence to handle the situation.

Friends I have made in the past years became very important source of support. Been there done that friends like B & Stacey are my mental support on a daily basis. I want them to know I need them so much. Con and Andria show me what friends are for in times of need. Others sms and mail frequently to tell me they love me.

I believe I was quite depressed for the past week but I believe I am getting out of it. Post nat depression is very real. Look deeper into a humorous blog on breastfeeding and you can see stress tucked in every paragraph. New mothers to be... relax and chill, dont take things too hard or keep things in...New fathers to be, handle a post nat mother tenderly and brace yourself for hard times as she needs you every support.

The Lactating Cow

2010-11-26T01:13:00.000-08:00

Breastfeeding - the primary preoccupation of a new mum deserves a whole chapter on its own... SO! Hear the two week old lactating cow speak! Mothers, doctors, nurses who breastfeed or who promote total breastfeeding are like keen members of an obessive cult with a mission to recruit more likeminded members or to influence/ brainwash freethinker new mothers. Hearing successful breastfeeding mums with a halo above their heads share their wonderful experiences and looking at their glowing happy faces reminds me of the holy saints of multi-level marketing companies or charismic priests of churches with open arms saying " come, join me..."... scary.... very scary.... where is the shrine that I need to pray to?

Well, I am not for or against breastfeeding. I think its certainly better than formula milk so I try to do it. This is the story of my on/off success. Please prepare your tissue paper while reading my struggles...

First breastfeeding was Day Two in KK. Not bad for the first few times... then OH NO.... unsuccessful, Megan is still hungry. For those who have no idea on the process of breastfeeding, let me introduce you to this ancient science. KK recommends feeding on demand and as the name suggest - offer your breast when baby cries. Done correctly, baby should cry for milk every 2-3 hrs. Offer your right breast for 15-20 mins then left breast. Repeat this process in the next 2-3 hrs.

Instructions are simple and clear cut, wait till you actually start! The few unsuccessful times, I feed to exhaustion and Megan still cries for milk. I actually had her glued to my breasts for almost 2 hrs before she is satisfied and willing to sleep. I remember Lx waiting outside for me to finish and commended that I am the champion breast for lactating this long. I corrected him that it took me 2 hrs to do a 30mins job so its not what he thinks... Immdiately he downgraded me from Champion Breast to Underperforming Breast.

I still presevere for breastfeeding. Somewhere down the road, to breastfeed becomes a MUST. Oh no, I am influenced by the cult... The feeling is quite intense. The other time I have such "have to do it" emotion must be when I was rescuing the damn victim from the seabed and during surfacing saw our dive boat anchored far far away. Its a long way to tow and my victim take her role as a drowned swimmer REALLY seriously. Give up now and scream for the dive instructor to rescue the rescuer and wake my victim up? I have dived hard for the past days and in a few more days I will get my licence. Damn.... better to continue towing the fat pig. I CAN DO IT. I MUST.... Yes, this is exactly how I feel about breastfeeding... keep trying, it will pass, just establish my feeding routine... I CAN, MUST, HAVE TO.

Back home with Megan. Complication of the human factor. This time its the NURSES verses the CONFINEMENT LADY. Round One FIGHT! Nurses strongly recommend total breastfeeding and no supplementing with formula. Dont use tit bottles or else baby will prefer that to your nipples. Confinement lady subtly say "already not enough milk still dun give supplement, baby is hungry and will keep crying/ cant sleep properly at length...

Just think, other than the mother, who will actually insist on the very difficult process of total breastfeeding day and nite, 40 mins each session, 2-3hrs intervals? And that is when you are a very successful lactating cow which I am not. Confinement lady is not wrong.. hey I have a human relation to manage for a month as well... ok, supplement plus please take over the 3am shift as well so I dont need to wake up so many times in the nite. Confinement Lady WINS!

More complication - rashes

The rashes on my skin suddenly moths into wide circles and within 3 days spread from my thights down to my toes and up to my face. My entire body became enveloped in rashes which are inflamed and itchy. I literally feel like a leper. In the past 2 weeks, many gynes have seen the rashes but all dismiss it as homonal and that it will subside on its own. I mean, what can I say when you dish out the homone card right? Only when we brought Megan to see Vincent for her cheft did he stopped and seriously examine the mother of his patient. "this is not right, ah di boy say its homones? Then you are allergic to Megan.. hahahah...possible you know... hey but serious, you should see a derm"

Skin center was closed for the weekend, we rushed down to KK's 24 hrs women's clinic coz Ken can tell u I was certainly lapsing in and out of depression. If I am not scratching my entire body causing many areas to bleed, I have fatigue setting in with conjoined Megan/ breast and still not achieving lactation success. For me to get more rest, more bottlefeeding were given to Megan and I see my milk production dwindle and Megan preferring the bottle. If I do not feed, eventually I will stop producing milk. Catch 22. Every tiny comment about my milk production stressed me out and reduced me to tears if I am not throwing a tantrum already... I am certainly stressed and depressed... My low point in life just got lower.

Round Two. STRESS verses BREASTFEEDING. FIGHT! Er... stress dun play fair since it totally handicap milk production so there is no real fight.... nevertheless - Stress WINS!
Back to KK, this time the doctor was horrified quoting that they never have such a terrible case before. In the doc's exact words, this is too serious and beyond KK and gyne's scope, please head down to skin center as an emergency patient. You cant blame me for being pissed. so many medical professionals dismiss my rashes as trival and now they tell me its too serious for them to handle?! Lucky for me, there is always the dependable Con. She gave me Dr Loke's contacts and we rushed down to see the Derm. Old Loke says I am suffering from a rare case of immune system breakdown... actual cause is unknown. A few suspects - painkiller from KK (told to stop... lucky I hav no real need for those), high level of stress (the start and peak of the rashes tally with my high stress periods.

"I cannot think of another way... I am going to give u a high steriod base medicine and in high dosage for 5 days to quickly bring this down, it will give u gastric and keep u awake at nite. You have to stop breastfeeding"... AH DUH..... ROUND THREE- RASHES verses BREASTFEEDING. FIGHT! Rashes WIN and win hands down!

Lets tally our score - COMPLICATIONS-3, BREASTFEEDING-0. COMPLICATIONS WIN!
Aiyah but all mothers still want the best for the child so I will still like to breastfeed if possible. This period of time, I will practise Pump and Dump to at least keep my underperforming breast lactating... Now Now Now, where is the shrine again?

The First Few Days - The whole truth and nothing but the truth

2010-11-21T23:32:00.000-08:00

"Cherish every moment because they are very precious. " - B.

I m writing this blog to remind myself of all these moments - its less than a week and i m already forgetting many wonderful episodes which I would kill to record for life.

During breastfeeding, Megan will sometimes exhibit the most innocent eyes, looking keenly from me to the surrounding and back. It is a look that melts my heart but hey wait a min, that is her signature innocent look when she is guilty of something. When she does that, it is almost a certainity that she is going to poo big time while suckerling. After which she will give us a most satisfied coy smile and expect us to clear up her mess..

Our first non assisted poo poo experience was hilarious (in hindsight). Megan was doing her room in and halfway through her feeding, I smell poo and since I am nursing a wound and cannot move around (yeah!), I pass this first diaper changing task to Ken. My god, it was A LOT of poo.... Disgust aside, Megan was already crying and we went into panic. Ken removed the soiled diaper and threw it onto the floor and in frenzy start wiping her butt with wet tissues (throwing very used item onto the floor as well... a baby cot is only this big for so many items rite?!). I was screaming at him for wiping the shit in the wrong direction which may cause infection for Megan... More panic... Ken ran to press the button for the nurse.... too much shit everywhere, cannot finish wiping....Megan cried louder... no nurse came (Sabo us big time - they were usually prompt. cheat us with their sales pitch)... more panic... where is the new diaper?... more things fell on the floor... "dear how to wear the diaper? which side is front?"..."er.. the wings sides in front... ok not sure... try wing side front... oh shit! No? ok opp side?".... CRY!!!!!!!! After an eternality, we were saved by the nurse.

Ken also made one extremely important contribution - naming and renaming Megan. We were fixed on the chinese name Loh Rui Bin months before.... But the very night before the operation, Ken crawled into bed around 11plus and told me "we got a problem". The teochew pronouncation of Rui Bin is Swee Ping aka sweeping. "The other kids in school will laugh at Megan... gotta change"... So how did we manage to conjour out a new name within our 2 days hectic life in ward 81 bed 25?

Introducing the chinese fortune teller shop on L1 of KK.

For $128, the master will propose to you a selection of chinese characters that will best suit the child based on her ba zhi. The name will take into consideration the character stroke count, avoid words that clash with her seniors in the family, and compliment plus compenstate for her 5 elements.... the package includes a detailed explaination of the meaning of the chosen name and a general forecast of her life ahead. Gee... Oh we actually only paid $120 because KK gave us a $8 voucher to offset the service. PLUS you are entitled to some AIA insurance package at a discount of sorts. Wow.... Roll EyeBall now... Despite all the roll eyeball tactic, the master's proposed characters are actually pretty cool. His recommended characters are not the commonly used ones and they have deep meaning... errr.. actually I cant really read half of the text. ok 60%... FINE... 70%... its times like these when you want to kick yourself for not learning more mandarin.... (so how do I know how to pronounce the words and their meaning? - Peizhi lah... still number one). All in all, I rolled my eyeball, bought into the service and am a happy customer. Megan's chinese name is now Loh Hui En.

Confinement Help.

Everyone, you need as much help as you can get. The best people to help are parents and a good confinement lady. In my case, they are both my inlaws and SC, a lady from malaysia. SC was recommended to me by our GE agent and I can tell u, I am a cool mother simply because SC did such a good job looking after Megan and me. There are many food I dislike - kidney for example but that happens to be one key ingredient. My inlaws already did a good job frying it with ginger to mask the taste but SC manage to make them more tasty even wo heavy flavors. Her food is good and their job is really not easy.They work 24 hrs for 28 days in a row in a stranger's home, facilitaing the whole process till our house feels like a confinement resort. On top of the job requirements, SC really dotes on Megan. It did not take me long to realise that other than recuperating/blogging/ enjoying life in this home resort, I need to quickly tap into SC's skills and learn as much as possible in this one month.

My inlaws were the greatest help. There are just so many bits and pieces to do. Our place is not equipped for a new mum in confinement, much less for a new born. My fridge is not stocked with "real food" per say... Yah ice-cream, chocolates & drinks aplenty. Herbbs, red dates, fungus, chicken, pork, fish... sorry. My FIL also took to be our driver, fetching us for our various checkups. My MIL was also so busy that on some days, her hair was dislevelled. Trust me, THAT is a rare sight...

On the forth day, Megan makes a trip to the Polyclinic to check for jaundice. With a baby in tow, we attracted a different kind of crowd - the grandmas! They walked pass, glanced at Megan, went "so cute!!!" then lingered at lennnngth to chat with you on the topic of grandchildren and babies. The lingo used to describe babies are worth compiling into a book. "My granddaughter is only 2.6kg at birth, so small, the head is only an orange.", "aiyoh, my grandson worse, 26 week, only 1 kg, the size of a black chicken in the market, so heartpain..."

Cant imagine Megan has high jaundice level when she looks so pink. We need to suntan the kid.

Ok SC frowniing that I am sitting here blogging so I better go lie down and sleep.... next time my friends!

The Final Lap and the Big Day

2010-11-21T23:28:00.000-08:00

Megan remains beech so a Cesarean date was scheduled - 18th Nov 2010. I am unsure if I was disappointed or relief at the news but with such certainty of a day and time, I feel a reassurance and control which I have not felt before. one point for C sec.

The last few days leading up to 18th was bad. Developed flu, cough and slight fever. To add insult to this new development, I started some dumb homonal changes and broke out in severe rashes... itching like there was no tomorow. From a cool preggie, I degraded into some miserable irritable wretch who looks and feel diseased. This must be some low points in my life.

Never been through an operation before plus a super low pain treshold, I grew nervous and anxious as days closed in. An unscheduled re-check up on the 16th @KK calmed my nerves. My gyne was not available but what a detailed check the nurses n doc on duty gave me. This trip convinced me that KK is the best choice we could have ever made. Not that Mt E is no good, but KK is a true blue power house with countless professional and knowledgeable staff. My heart is at ease.
0630hrs of 18th, we brought a lot of barang to check in - Mac(internet!! a must), PSP, games (Love the new Patapon game for me! PATA PATA PATA PON!!! PON PON PATA PON!!! FEVER!!!), books, clothes, nice toiletries.... u got to be asking - what were we thinking!?? Sorry first time... They may not be relevant to the situation but the effort and heart that goes into building up the excitment of going for an adventure camp calm stray nerves and make the hospital stay mentally very enticing.
Like all good hotels, we checked directly into our Ward 81, Bed 25... which is also furnished like a hotel room (37 inch LCD TV, minibar, wardrobe, safe etc). Congregations of day and night shift midwifes and nurses came to introduce themselves and prepare/ brief me on what is to come while he was taken to another room to change into surgery gown to witness the event. Lets say, service and staff to guest ratio is in the five star range. I feel good already.
In the operation theatre, I was prepared to freak out during epidural injection but surprisingly it is painless. Naked and numb from chest down, they blocked my view to where the action will take place. Kinda surreal when a young medical intern appeared from nowhere saying "hi. how are u feeling.." to me. He like me must be the most awarkard pple in the room with nothing to do. Difference is I am a paralysed slab on the table and he keeps hovering in/out of my view. "Hi, u ok? ... Hi.." He must have greeted me like these a few times.
It was only after a nurse exclaimed " shouldn't someone bring the husband in?" did poor Ken get to arrive at the scene. He later admited he felt service to him was quite unVIP. Honestly with all decked out in face masks green suites and me without glasses, I cant see really make out which is Ken. Hovering intern can jolly well be ken - also wearing glasses. I was just beginning to do my mental preparation for the slice when suddenly everyone started congratulating me, starting from THE intern of coz. "I can see Megan now" was what I heard from man on the left- apparently my husband. Wow, it was over before I knew it started! Wow... how much did I pay for these few seconds? Literally few seconds! ok ard 2 mins... painless 2 minutes...
Megan was brought to me while the sewing action continues below. One look at her and I am in love... SSSSSSSSOOO good looking! Allow me to somewhat elaborate on this stunning realisation. There is me and there is Ken. So where did all these good looks on Megan come from? Wow... Really, Megan's good looks was quite a revelation!
ok, back to the moment - I was expecting a bluish green infant with a winkled pent up face, knotted forehead and tightly closed eyes letting out the "gek for 10 months" first cry/scream/wail... come on, in reality, who says newborns jus out of the womb are a sweet sight to behold? Most of my friends needed weeks to months before they develop love for their initally "ugly" babys.
But Megan is clean, pink, calm and super alert with big earnest eyes! Cleft is minimium. Actually what cleft? hardly notice anything.. forgive me if I indulge in my praise of my Megan (I mean now and numerous times later in this and future blogs). I wonder if Megan is truly this much prettier than all other babies we know of or we have simply succomb to the "my baby is SSSOOO cute" symdrome. We know what you are thinking - yes she is indeed the prettiest, thank you v much...
Megan was automatically taken to ICU due to cleft and did not follow us to the ward. Ken filled me in with all the baby details, photos, videos. By late afternoon, ICU basically sent Megan back, quoting that she is more than doing fine and does not require any intensive care. Cool! This story is getting better and better!
On my side, I was bracing up for the epidural to wear off. 2 hrs. 6 hrs, 8 hrs.... still no pain settling in. WOW. Scheduled to take solid food only on the second day but nurses tot otherwise. So I was eating, drinking, chatting, playing with baby and getting bored from not enough action on Day One. My in laws were most concerned and busied themselves with brewing red date tea and fish bone soup for me. SKII miracle water for rosy cheeks? No need.
We were too hyper to sleep that nite... wrong move because KK strongly recommended Megan to room in with us on the second day and nite so that we can be familiarised with looking after her. The smiling nurses are only a button press away anyway. "You must try", they say. We bought into their sales pitch and life literally changed 180 degrees from that point onwards.

Megan's A - Z Animal Chart

2010-11-09T20:35:00.000-08:00

Finally completed!!! I am so happy...Now here goes, introducing the first 26 washable felt toys YY sews for Megan's Animal Alphabet Chart

A for Alligator (Yes not crocodile, Megan learns chim words)

B for Bear (Ken says this is him!)

C for Cow (Mimi's Fav)

D for Duck (ok, I designed this as a Bird but everyone picked this up and go quack quack... I get it- change to Duck, easy)

E for Elephant

F for Frog (dun it remind u of the sakea sushi frog?)

G for Giraffe (cute loh this one)

H for Hippo

I for Iguana (Kinda like how this turns out)

J for Jellyfish (My fav coz its so simple to do)

K for Kangeroo

L for Lion

M for Moose (This was the Deer which no one recognised so its now a Moose)

N for Newt (too lazy to do the fourth leg.. anyway I think newt can regenerate its missing limbs rite?)

O for Owl

P for Penguin

Q for Quail

R for Rabbit (Florence say it looks so sad)

S for Sheep

S for Snail (ai? why I do double Ss?)

T for Turtle (I know Dolly, you wanted me to sew the other turtle because that looks like a friend for the penguin. BUT turtle is ME!!! I dont want to be the friend of the penguin...)

U for Unicorn (The imaginary animal)

V for Vulture

W for Whale (The first animal I sewed - Ken calls him, Heli the Whale with the helicoper wings)

X for Xray fish (Jess suggested to just do an Xmas tree if we cant find an animal for X. The convincing reason she is going to give Megan is - Its Xmas, all the animals are on holiday so no need to learn any animal for X!!! - I have to admit, I love your logic, no wonder we are friends...)

Y for Yak

Z for Zebra

The Makings of the Animal Chart

2010-11-08T22:26:00.000-08:00

He pointed to the blank wall in Megan's room and said "will look great if we hang a colrful alphabet chart there..." Sure my love, looks to be Project Number Two for YY!! I will do an animal alphabet chart for Megan. Better than anything the shop sells... First, draw out the animals! Then take the drawings to people who actually knows how to sew felt toys since I have never done these stuff before. Rumour has it that Jess knows... Soon, everyone along Legal Lane got involved... One great thing about girlfriends is that they can all get excited with you on craft projects... Suddenly Project Two becomes very exciting.

First question everyone asked is if I drew these animals myself. The answer is Yes. Are the designs all original? Yes and No. I researched online on the images of the animals to check out what is the most distinct and easy to draw profile. Then I will sketch out a few possible profiles in the actual scale of the stuffed toy to gauge cuteness and if they will be easy to cut and sew. Galfriends choose their most preferred sketch and those usually will be the chosen one.

With 26 alphabets and many gals, it can get very confusing. Dolly rooted on Penguin and Jess wanted Panda. Cindy suggested Vixen while Dolly prefers Veal (once an animal too u know). No one likes Iguana and since they are all IJ gals, they demanded IJ gal!!! *faint* But we really have fun, I must say...

Sometimes, inspiration comes from toys in my room! Was cutting the felt for my zebra when I saw the wooden zebra toy Ming gave me sitting on my shelf. So much cuter than my original. Mai tu liao. COPY. Trace on butter paper, tag onto 2 pieces of felt, cut and sew. Excuse me, all the stripes are sewn on, not glued on ok! Add beads for eyes, wool for hair, stuff the body with foam and TADA!!! One animal is completed... 25 more to go!!! On a free day, I can make approx 5 stuffed toys... animals like Giraffee or Zebra with too much details will take much longer.

With all the animals completed... within 2 weeks! Great job YY!!... now comes the second part - doing the A-Z chart to house all the animals. The idea is for me to ask Megan during one of our play times - "Megan, where does Giraffe go?" And Megan will take the Giraffe and velcro it to R... "Good gal, now Whale??"...

We went to Spotlight to buy fabric for the A-Z and the fabric chart... Man, I hate that place... messy and confusing, why cant Spore open better craft shops (like Queen's street???). Why didnt I have a collection/ a secret stash of bits and pieces of fabric/ribbons/strings? Sigh...

Time to consult the guru for the actual A-Z chart construction. Instead of velcro, Mimi suggested animals returning back to their homes/ nests/ caves/kennels etc.... At different age, I can use the chart to teach Megan different aspects of the animals...wow! "Megan, which home does the Doggie go back to? Yes Kennel.. Lion? Cave.. Good Job..." Fantastic idea mum, my heart is with you... but time is running out since one more week I am popping... We simplify the chart construction and hey guys... that will be in the next blog... Wait and see!

The Good Body Guide by Dr Carole Hungerford

2010-11-02T19:34:00.000-07:00

The doctors of today prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure disease of which they know less, in human beings of whom they know almost nothing.

Voltaire 1694-1778

Reading a pretty good book these days recommended by a stand in GP who does not behave like the usual GP. She must be one of the extremely rare GP who actually ask questions before dishing out a conclusion on what is wrong with you. And she is the only GP who actually explain to us what drugs she intends to prescribe and if we are comfortable with the side effects or alternatively, can we adjust our lifestyle so that she can cut back one type of tablet. So impressed with her that Ken went to grab the book she recommends - The Good Body Guide.

The book is an easy read which covers many topics that question what we thought we knew. Starting from the agriculture evolution which encourage monoculture that narrows human intake of dietary variety, Hungerford pose the question if variety is important for optimum health. Even meat we eat are not free ranging anymore. We feed farmed animals crops we grew, which reflects needs other than nutrients. Yield, ease of harvest etc took precedent over a chemistry which we did not yet understand.

Our parents and doctors always tell us common facts like - "take more of this vegetable because this contains iron which is good for health". But nobody ever question where the iron in the vegetable comes from? Minerals like calcium, magnesium, iron, zinc, selenium, iodine etc - if they are not in the soil that the plant grows, there will be none in the plant. With poor soil health across the globe even in agriculture wonderlands like NZ & OZ, how do we know if the vegetables we are eating contain all these vital minerals at all? How about hydroponics (oh clean soil-less vegetables grown out of water) and GM species?

I was just flipping through a locally published health and lifestyle magazine which ran an extensive article on the importance of calcium, if milk is not adequate, go for tablets supplements. If I did not know better, I would head out to optimise my health by popping tablets after meals. No where is there a mention that too much calcium intake actually competes with our body's vital intake of magnesium and selenium - trace minerals that are associated with prevention of asthma, osteoporosis and depression... so why no mention of such information and need for balance? Who fund the article? Any politics involved in the drug or pharmaceutical industry/ companies which diagnose, fund trials and offer treatment drugs?

A chiropractic clinic promoting healthy lifestyle opened near my office recently. They advised to fix my slightly off-centered spine with a 12 months package which consist of 3 sessions per week for the 1st 3 months and 9 Xrays sessions (5 radiation shoots per session). Are they really concerned about my otherwise healthy 32 yr old body? Absolutely not.

An interesting matter of speech highlighted by Hungerford is one of language and mathematical reasoning of statistical analysis in the industry. Suppose your doctor tells you that Tamoxifen will reduce your breast cancer recurrence by 20% as stated by the drug company. You will most likely opt for the treatment. But if the doctor tells you that your cancer recurrence is 20% and Tamoxifen will reduce the 20% by 20%, reducing your real risk by a mere 4%, will you still so readily opt for a drug that has its own side effects?

Insight into many questions we should be asking... A highly recommended read my friends... Go grab it

Mothers

2010-10-25T19:25:00.002-07:00

I delicate this blog to myself and all mothers and mothers to be out there. Guys, stand aside.

This is my 36th week of pregnancy. Technically I can deliver anytime starting from next week. Time flies... Carrying Megan so far has been smooth sailing and relatively easy when I compare to many of my friends' pregnancy. No morning sickness, no cravings, no mishaps etc.

At 5th month's scan, our gyne confirmed that Megan has cleft lips. I had to undergo scans and tests to assertify that there are no further abnormalities or else I would have to abort the child. Cleft being a facial defect is the least of a mother's concern. It is the inside that matters to me. On the outside, some may think I show few emotions. No. It is just that I do not think cleft makes any difference. Megan is the same as any child outside, no need to make a big fuss over it.

The past 2 weeks sees me going downhill fast. I am exhausted yet cannot sleep. Fully alert at 3am every day is certainly nature's way of preparing me for Megan's 12am, 3am, 6am's feeding pattern in the near future... Ha! If I do sleep, it is plagued with dreams of labour, laundry, cooking etc... Tsk tsk.. At this late stage, Megan is still in beech position and that worries me (I am hardly a worry wart)...

My backaches get intensely painful, especially when Megan suddenly moves. If only I have an inhouse massage lady at beck and call!!! But Limin's orange massage ball (wee my birthday present!!!) came to the rescue... what a fantastic self help product! Thank you babe... 100 points! Highly recommended.

Shower, bending down, cooking, ok everything... everything starts getting difficult now that I suddenly ballonned. But at 9 months, I have only gained a modest 11.5kg. So if I am already dying, how did those mothers who gained 20plus kg survive??? I salute them.

Carrying a baby for 10 months is a very enriching experience. Something only the mother can truly understand. Not to discredit the guys' contribution to childbearing but this blog is not about the man anyway. And I haven't even experience the delivery part yet. No wonder all songs sing praises of mothers's greatness.

It is quite obvious why nature selects woman as the child bearer. Woman has an inner strength man do not have. Woman may appear weak and cry easily but that is because we always embrace and deal with problems in life, we break down to release tension by crying and seek comfort from friends when we thought we cannot take no more, then go back to facing our everyday life with renewed energy.

Woman may be the fairer sex bur certainly not the weaker sex. If anything, pregnancy has gained me a whole new respect for mothers and woman in general.

The world is becoming a better place for woman. But lets not decieve ourselves that we hold equal social or professional standing as man. Before my pregnancy, I see very clearly a fairly male dominated work environment... (mine is a construction industry in general). Woman need to put in extra to prove their worth and usually get half the respect as compared to man. Discrimination is commonplace in some countries and no matter how good we are, it is getting nowhere. But when we arrived, we arrived in a big way. Victory is sweet for a woman.

At home, we have the roles of wives, daughters, daughter in laws, now, mothers to play... And we are still "we" when we do find time to look within ourselves to rediscover who we are and what we want... These few weeks I thought of all the working mothers I know with infants or toddlers. Architects, lawyers etc... many of whom recently promoted to higher positions while still in breastfeeding and expressing milk stages... wow... did anyone tell you gals what a fantastic job you gals are doing? Can I join your rank?

To my mother, my mother in law, kei, andrea, belinda, song, limin, stacey, whyee's sister, karen, claudia, connie, moon, fion, kj, shufei, this blog is specially delicated to you for simply being who you are.

Cheers!!!

Florence's Birthday

2010-10-22T02:37:00.000-07:00

It is our dear Florence's birthday... only knew it mid morning. Got to do something for my cooking sifu!!! Legal Lane suggested flower delivery which we all know will make dear Florence smile.

I thought we need to do just a little bit more to enhance the surprise so I went for a walk to source for resources around vivo. Cold Storage was selling Chrysanthemum that looks so cute - like yam dumplings and I suddenly recall Daiso selling dim sum baskets. Hey dumplings and dim sum baskets go well together! YES! I can do a stack of dim sum baskets, each layer containing different hao liao! hahahaha...

Basket One - roses with honey

Basket Two - purple yam dumplings! yah...

Basket Three - Big cookie from Starbucks

As expected, Florence was blown away with the little surprise we planned for her. Remember to make use of the dim sum baskets to make nice char siew bao for us!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE!

Megan's Height Chart

2010-10-20T21:21:00.000-07:00

He introduced me to this shop called The Better Toy Store in Taka... I loved the shop! Not too sure how children will react to the toys but they totally appeal to me. Yes they do sell better toys by far... These should be the stuff that children play with - instead of pink plastic barbies, flashing colors mobiles, electronic games etc.... These days kids are only attracted to brain numbing electronics... this place sells good old slow toys.

We were fancinated with height charts sold in the shop... But those for gals are 'not surprising' painted in pink, pink and more pink... NO WAY MAN!!!!!!!!!! Plus they are really expensive... I cannot help thinking that I can make such height charts myself with cuter grahics and better colors (the latter is a total leap of faith). So it was decided that YY will create Megan's height chart from scratch... Off we go to Fancy Paper last week to purchase materials...

Day and night, I worked.... searching the net for inspiration of what to draw.... As you all know. CUTE is not my forte... The first owl completed is very telling - it has the most conservative colour scheme and looks almost albino. Tone on tone colors went out of the window with the second owl design - here comes the saturated blue and mango yellow!!
Paper cut out is tougher than I tot - No wonder hardly anyone does such craft now... Instant Gratification. Instant Graditfica
tion... It keeps ringing in my head... But this slow craft is really better than flat computer graphics...

Gee my back is breaking and someone should invent circle punchers of various sizes!!! Must be the sudden spur of maternal love that keep me cutting and pasting... God, when is the last time I actually use glue? Primary School?

My mini project completed and laminated!! YEAH.... I am so proud of myself. This must be the cutest and most colorful project I have ever done. My homones must be changing! Time for Ken to take over and paste the chart on the wall for Megan to meaure up in future... Now what is next?

YY's Cooking - Chapter Two

2010-10-13T18:20:00.001-07:00

Ups and downs is how I will describe my cooking jounery since the last food blog.

I recall a good friend telling me how difficult and fustrating it is to cook and I cannot agree more. Especially for people like us who are new to this mix and match of ingredients... We put our hearts and efforts to creation of a dish and it turns out funny. By then, it is late, husbands are hungry and we all have to eat the product of our failed effort... This is not easy to swallow...

What to do? Try and try again... Out of 10 failures, there is always 1 or 2 success that will keep us going.

I shall start with the successful recipes

Double Baked Potato with bacon, cheese and spring onions - crispy on the outside, soft on the inside

Sauteed Portabello Mushrooms - such easy to make dish and so expensive when ordered in a restaurant!

Strawberry Banana Crepe with chocolate - Yum Yum

Savory Otah Egg Mayo Crepe - Spicy

Abalone Mushroom Baked Rice - Florence's little secret

The not that successful but can be greatly improved recipes:

Spicy Mango Salad - why is it not spicy at all? Not enough red onions? Steamed Fish - Timing timing timing.... plus its a bit blandStewed Tofu with Mixed Mushrooms - somehow the flavor did not enter the tofu... frustrated

Ginger Pork - Tough.... I must learn how to slice pork into thin strips!

At this point, I must give acknowledgement to him for very patiently trying out all the not very tasty food I put out on the table .

Total Failure dish:

Salted Fish Chicken - aiyah not that this is not well excecuted but we just dont like the taste of the salted fish...

Cooking

2010-09-14T21:00:00.000-07:00

"YY cooks!" B exclaimed... yesyes... times have really changed...

Today I decided to blog about a short history or shall I say triumph of my own cooking.

Growing up in a family where the mum is a fantastic cook may not be the best motivation for one to learn cooking. There is simply no need when good comfort food is readily available, I need just to wait and eat.

30 plus years and I never feel inspired to start cooking. I guess the first person(s) whom I should give credit to for making me take the mental leap that cooking is not rocket science is Fiona and Matt when I was in Toronto. She is a sous chef and he an ex-cook turned gardener. In the mornings, Fiona and me will spend time in the kitchen talking about food before she disappears for the day. In the evenings, Matt will invite me to share dinner and we will discuss vegetables while the chicken grills... For the first time, I feel that cooking need not be perfect. "Use my kitchen" they say, "anyone can cook"

Nice... Tempted. Not enough for action.

It was only because of his birthday some years back did I physically cook. Full credit must be given to my good mate, Peter Kelly. Knowing that I cannot even boil potatoes to save my life, Peter's recipe for steak with red wine reduction on a bed of mashed potatos and greens on the side is the most through and idiot proof recipe the world has witnessed.

It took him a full 2 hrs to explain to me every minute process and detail (literally down to what I can do with my idle left hand and the 2 min interval while the steak cooks). I kept the stacks of paper where Peter drew sections, diagrams, actual 1 to 1 ratio of the diced potato... true blue technical service director style! KUDOs...

He even brought me to the butcher to buy the meat!!! He would have insisted to get the greens and butter at cold storage together if not for the fact that my pride does not allow me to admit I have no clue on such simple tasks.

This first cooking trial must be so historic that even my big boss, JMB, gave me a half day to get ready. I started preparations at 3ish and finished cooking 2 steaks by 8.30pm. Peter Kelly cannot for hell's sake understand why his student need 5 hrs to cook but hey!!! not everyone is a natural ok! Important thing is the final product - Ken finished everything, loving every bite. I was too hot and exhausted to honestly enjoy. That night, arm muscles which I did not know I even had, ached. Had to wake Ken up to massage me! Think I had cramps.

Look at the photos!!! aint it great? Quite Pro huh....

Then that was it... for the longest time, steak with red wine reduction is the only dish I know how to make. Fine, I cooked it ONCE... Early this year, we finally got our own place. Newly married, suddenly I see the importance of cooking! Picked up a few simple dishes from mimi and for a while it was good. But various upsetting setbacks eventually make cooking very discouraging and exhausting.

Recently, a friend got me all inspired again. Introducing Florence, our office receptionist! A young little gal but what a good cook she is! Sharing recipes and doing grocery shopping became our favorite past time!

Chicken and potato stew. Dont look too good but wow... the goddess of comfort food and one of Gunnar's fav (out of the 3 dishes i cooked for him anyway)Sweet and sour pork. Effort dish, should have used green capcium for better colors... 7/10! I am almost there! reaching perfection...

Black Bean Fish. My pride and joy... this is fantastic, I am really good at cooking these days!!

Lemon Garlic Chicken Wings. Such a simple dish but be prepared to chop garlic till ur wrist breaks. Good recommendation Florence!Fried Rice. Tried many versions but this one is truly the best! I like the bit of salted egg york flavor...

Saturaday morning breakfast. Meat patty, honey apple ham, tomato, poached egg and cheese in warm ciabatta loaf plus tray of honey kiwi and prunes at the side -

Ok, some days are a Boo Boo. Saw a photo of a porkchop w potato in Bakerzin's menu and tried to replicate it. It says "succulent pork loin pan grilled with garlic, parsley, butter and olive oil with a side serving of sauteed potatoes and Dijon mustard- $19.90".

Tried to top up with a light mushroom spagehetti and greens. ok plus 2 slices of mushroom pizza... Just in case the food dun taste good..Mince meat in spagehetti? Yah just in case not enought meat for him. Egg? yah, just in case meat not nice... always another option... In the end. its a combo plate of everything because I cannot make up my mind!!! URGH!!!! (Plus I need to work on my colors!)

But.. But... taste is not bad... getting there.. getting there...Mince Meat Grilled Brinjal. Florence's reciple calls for steamed long brinjal. My mum says "no way brinjals should be steamed! Either fry or grill!! Go for Japanese round brinjals.. Better" I tried all ways/ kinds and it still taste strange... Damn... This is my fourth brinjal attempts and it is still.... bad. Florence, I tell u lah, the problem is your recipe.

Egg Omelete. There should be a sense of happiness when one eats egg omelete... Mine is tasteless. Was told it is a result of my damn tiny drop of oil and stingy usage of salt (a pinch is not a few grains) on a non stick pan. Ok! Healthy is not tasty...

Will keep you guys posted on more YY's cooking success and failures! Cheers..

Plants Chapter II

2010-09-14T20:36:00.000-07:00

Realised that I have missed out on some of my plants. They told me so and they are feeling a bit sore about the entire affair.

My Java Palm -

honestly one of our very first immigrant and so far the tallest. It is forever the backdrop for the rest and boring to photograph so it never occur to me to introduce this loyal green. Er... its soil is now overgrown with mushrooms! Not so nice. Plus we saw a evil looking grasshopper amongst the leaves this weekend... no... not nice at all... Palm, can you please do some tidying up after yourself?

Lantana -

new kid on the block. My hot favorite - great body shape, colourful and smells great... of coz Xianger says its poisonous!!! First photo is whow it looked when we first bought it... last week, Ken fed it sum goat dung and suddenly we have n explosion of colors!!! The plant is "pu zua" (heaty)

Look Look... amazing colors! Different shades of pink (gee I really dont like pink). The orange blossoms are truly heaty outbreaks. Yellow! My fav! And the black flowers are not wilted versions of the whites.. they are actually BLACK... coolllll

Anthurium - just realised that my perfect white is not Calic lily but anthurium... geee. Oh check out my christmas fern at the bottom!!! it is flowering!!! Previously we tot it was half dead!

Erba Cipollina - This Dolly Lau appeared at my desk and gave me this sachet to grow. Told me its spice seeds that came free with the pan she bought. Yah, I can tell its spice but what spice is that? Wooo... one website says it means marijuana grass... nice.. Chey, google says is chives. Boring...

Green Fingers (trying) to be)

2010-09-02T23:54:00.000-07:00

Our living room has a strip of planter latch and we have finally gotten to filling them up with greens... My oldest friend, Xianger advised us to start growing everything from seeds... do not buy from nursery because plants there contain a lot of fertiliser and pesticides... "Aiyah, caring for plants is just like caring for human beings. The more attention you give them, water and feed them, the happier they are and the healthier they will grow...". Since that fateful day, we have tried numerous seeds... bell pepers, chillies, tomatos, flowering plants, morning glory(that would be nice!!) etc.... We followed the instructions on the back of the seed packets diligently. Every weekend, planting and transplanting, going to various nurseries, talking to friendly uncles on how to fertilise, what pots to use... Sitting and getting our hands full of soil by the window became our favorite pastime. It is really insightful to see how plants grow from tiny seeds. We spent every free hour investigating and observing how the roots break the seed coat, secure themselves in the soil and carry their food sac proudly in the air with their newly "strengthened" stem... Most of our little seeds did burst into seedlings. Seeds taken care by me prosper... initially... But they never really grow into adulthood. My understanding with my plants is that we coexist, each minding our own business.... It was good, for a while... then non survived beyond sprouting 2 big leaves... They are simply too weak against the sourching sun (in all fairness, the sun killed my plants!!!) Seeds cared by him... well... slow start but they began life strong and well ... Let's say someone's extensive and prematured transplanting of the tender ones killed them all... ok, our first few tries did not really work out. We rightfully concluded that the problem lies with inferior quality seeds! HA! So he bought a pack of duber expensive "golden chili seeds" (literally golden seeds). Not only did the gold standards seedlings make a smooth transit beyond the 5 leave treshold - a historial feat (see above!), they are still going stronger by the day as we speak!!!! The power of life must be inspiring. The neighbouring mint seedling is now more than 10 leave strong as well! NOW WE ARE TALKING. It will take us years to green our little strip if we really start from seeds. Hence the shortcut - Bought a pot of White/green Calla and it has since gave us a 3rd perfect white flower... We one day came home to find a new contribution by Mimi - a marcotting of a "I dunno pink or blue flowering plant which I pluck from the CC" firmly secured in a spare pot of soil. It was all willowly leaves for weeks till suddenly we see a bud. A week later, it is certainly a white (pink? blue?) bud... one morning before work. WALA... a fragile but beautiful PINK blossom!!! By the time we came back from work, the flower has wilted and dropped off. This series of photos were taken on the second blossom. How short is this moment of glory... I only have this chance to photograph it before i leave for work. By nightfall, its gone... Our spiky fern is not looking so well, like Xianger said...Pandang leaves and our very first pots of "dunno wat" greens remains happy and healthy... Time to groom and add some pandang to dessert soup. Last but not least... the most gay of them all - I think it is called "yellow malay flower plant"... it is certainly growing beyong well... it is fantastic...

27 weeks

2010-08-25T01:33:00.000-07:00

Ken bought me an iPhone 4. Finally, I am on par with the high tech cool dudes... WEE WEE!!! That does not however automatically make me e-savy. Feel-good emotions plunged immediately after I first tried to use the phone to call Cannot find the green CALL button!!! PANIC. Oh anyway, this blog is about the pregancy... hahahah. My iPhone "I'm expecting" Apps tells me that I am currently 27 weeks. And it is dead acurrate in informing me that I may/should/will be suffering from fatigue, backaches and difficulties in sleeping. Food cravings never really started for me but since I will be forgiven for munching... I might as well not give up on the chance to taste the chocolate peanut butter stack cake from Starbucks! HEAVENLY SINFUL!!!!!! Photo taken by my new gadget of coz. We finally got down to planning for the arrival of Megan this week. Listing the hand-me-down items, what to purchase, how to decorate the baby room (aka duty officer room). Finally signed up for our prenatal course. KK's extremely comprehensive 11 sessions prenat course is fully booked so we went for Thomson Medical's 6 session course. 2 slots left!!! Very excited...

Megan Loh Rui Bin

2010-07-27T19:51:00.000-07:00

Let me formally introduce my daughter - Megan, Loh Rui Bin. We are sumwat obsessed with a name that begins with an "M" and ends with an "N". If our baby is a boy, he will most likely to be called Morgan, Mortan, Martin etc... Her expected due date is 24 Nov 2010... During the last scan, doctor says she is fat, has quite a big head, and chinese legs (aka short)... For some reason, Megan is really excited these days because I can feel her kicking and turning in my tummy. Everytime she does that, I cannot help but savour such moments and smile. My little bundle of joy has been giving me serious backaches and swollen legs! Walking can be quite painful on some days... Haiz!! But other than these minor aches and pains, she is as cool as her mum. Tsk Tsk... She is going to grow up embracing what this world can provide -the good and the bad, the beautiful and the ugly... She is going to bask in the love and warmth of all who love her... she is going to one day fall but take in stride hardships and challenges life throws at her. She is going to learn that the world is not perfect but wonderful nevertheless. She will grow up as mummy's little pearl and in future, a fine young lady with a passion and spirit to inspire and influence... Cringe, my friends without children... your buddy here is turning into those mushy mothers who shows all the signs of "my baby is the cutteest!!!"... Rui Bin, we are so happy to have you... mummy love u. Cant wait for your arrival...

Bali Research Trip

2010-05-20T18:22:00.000-07:00

Hotel research trips are always a blast... Not only do you stay in nice places but you get to try interesting food concepts and savour what the market has to offer... This time, Andre and me ended up in Bali to sniff out St Regis, Alila Suites and Bulgari...

St Regis

Very very interesting, the driveway entry into St Regis. You actually enter the compound without realising it. After a short ride, it will suddenly dawn on you that "hey I like this lush landscape, where is this?". My dear, you are already in St Regis... WelcomeThen you encounter a monstrous ancient looking structure. Feels like a readaptation of cambodian ruins. Nevertheless, I like it. Impressive, imposing, a gd stage for unfolding drama. Lobby is typically St Regis in design and detailing. Aka, over-detail but grand and comfy. Ate with Victoria, Allan and Andre at the pool side restaurant facing the beach. Nice cosy place with whitewashed interiors and decorated with pale colored wayang kulit.. nice indigeous touch. Oh btw, food is disappointing. My room is a cool 92msq of space that is very thoughtfully considered. I did find it quite frustating to spend 10 mins walking round trying to find a empty countertop space to place my watch and accessories. Housekeeper does like to clutter up every table space with plates of fruits/ cards/ handwritten welcome notes/ menos etc... Bathroom is perfect. LLLLLLove it..Relaxed ambience totally destroyed by trying to sort out a "simple yet can turn disasterous" shanghai/ wenzhou flight arrangements with incompetent staff back home. Replying to emails burned my afternoon.

Pampered myself to a spa session after a totally stuffed breakfast. (Ken would love this breakfast) St Regis spa concept is butterfly inspired- backlit and floating butterflies are everywhere. I was very well looked after by very professional therapist... memoriable...

VERDICT: At US$450 a nite, not bad a deal... of the 3 resorts, this is the best.

Alila Suites Utuwatu

Heard that Ally and Lx wanna come here... opps sorry my backpacking buddies... so paisei

But once you step into the compound, you immediately feel refreshed. Lobby reminds me of Amansara but better. Waiting lounge looks right out to a pool and the sea beyond. The set up and color scheme is so chilled out that I agree with Victoria 100% that this is the perfect home. Ken, our next house will look like this ok. Living room opens out to our pool. ok with you or not?

Love the table. Ken, I think we need a table like this by our pool. Good for BBQ parties in the evenings.. kids can mess it up all they want.You can really tell Woha's signature from the villa architecture. Slide and hide walls everywhere. Rooms can be fully opened like a pavillion or enclosed in the comforts of AC. pretty pretty ammenity boxes.. BlissfulVERDICT: At US$650 a nite, it is not worth it. First day - totally excited. Second day - there is nothing to do, no beach, no activity. Resort too comtemplative and zen but honest, I have nothing to comtemplate no matter how deep I look inside myself... Bored and stressed w emptiness.

Bulgari

VERDICT: Din bother about photos, all black interiors and exteriors... US$850 a nite, for people with money chasing the fashionable. Rooms - bad. Restaurant - bad. Spa - bad. People in the pool - bored faces with no smiles.

Happy Birthday To Me

2010-03-09T01:19:00.000-08:00

There are a few things that became very apparent to me on my birthday celebration.

1. I am quite creative with flower arrangements. wow wow

2. I like inviting people over to the house

3. I make quite good Asian Tofu salad

4. My sister takes much better pictures than me (DANG!!)

My dayi's humour is one of the kind for her age. Oh I love her. The kids were promised a day of swimming with mimi and their mobile babysitters and all were looking forward to the splash.

A feast for hungry. Noodles and Kong Ba Bao (mimi), salad (me), chicken wings (wuyi), rice... None of us knows how to use the oven! Great job women!! When the party dies down, the real conversation begins over beer and chips.

Everyone tried their hands on the aggressive Wii Boxing game. Erwin's contiunous attacks need no defense, Frank's style apears to douge and hardly attacks, uncle Roger simply doesn't understand why he dies everytime and is our star entertainer (ie. laugh till your jaws get dislocated)

Bangkok Break

2010-03-08T23:27:00.001-08:00

The Plan - arrive in BKK. Check in. Eat. Shop. Spa. Eat. Shop. Eat... All in all, we excuted the plan to perfection.

Staying together in a suite has its obvious advantages. Allan always make sure the fridge is well stocked with wine and beer (regardless that it is Bangkok's No Alcohol Day!) and the dining table has supplies of chicken wings, chips etc

Andrea is dead serious in her online research about getting the best spa deal for all of us. Lemon Grass Thai Fine Dining Restaurant is a great place to introduce business associates to Thai food. ie. freshest ingredients, nice ambient, expensive prices, refined taste. BTW, I think the waiters snubbed us because we gave too little tips

Now here we are talking! SomBoon Seafood restaurant. Some say its sensational, others say its heavenly. I call it - worth dying for. I have classified it as a MUST GO pilgrimage. I have never felt so blissful just eating. The steam sotong is beyond excellent. The fried galic prawns is a total inspiration. The salted sea bass is the most wonderful food I have eaten... (A sense of melancholy down there...) If this is my last meal, I will be contented.