Bye Bye 2020

2020 would always be remembered as the year of the Covid and WFH. Knowing friends who lost their jobs, unable to reunite with families due to travel restrictions, had relatives who passed away due to the virus, we consider ourselves sailing through 2020, However with my industry being severely impacted, my end royally screwed with both hospitality and aviation hitting the longkang, for the first time in my career, I fear for my job.

 

Work from home at the dining room table was disruptive. Everyone passed by and everyone wanted something. People called and the first sentence was" oh? you are not working today ah?". Kids went "mummy where is the remote control?". "Lift up your legs", Ken would mop the floor when I most need to concentrate (but hey... kudos for mopping the floor !! I love you.)

To cope with being cooped up at home, Ken bought a new toy. I don't know how to operate it since the whole point of drinking coffee is to get out. And anything with movable parts register a broken history in my hands. Ken went YES YES YES stay away from my Nespresso....  Snacks from “values that last” apparently are great stress relievers too. 

Mental health should be given better attention this year. 

I saw a gentleman in the park suddenly moth into a raging manic stalking and verbally abusing an elderly man who refused to wear a mask. I heard upstairs neighbor screaming death threats at some random barking dog and the tirade of "i will murder you and your whole family" went on for 30 mins with a background music of smashing objects. 

Depression and sucide amongst people I know not that uncommon this year. I myself fumed uncontrollably every time that Ferrari engine revved downstairs and I wish everything ill happen to that asshole so I do not need to suffer that pretentious noise again. 

Friends told me a survey conducted in school showed that many students felt life meaningless and wanted to die. Even Megi came to me often with " I am bored/ sad/ angry and I don't know why".... well so did I when I was in Primary and Secondary school!!! Welcome to being alive!

There is nothing wrong being bored, sad, angry. There is nothing wrong to want to aim a rotten egg at the Ferrari since it is well within my aim. (I was stopped by Ken who told me I can't afford to pay for the damages)... It is what we do about it. (ok money more important)

The biggest beneficiaries of WFH are M&M. I had never spent so much time with the kids as I considered myself simply not good with young children. 2020 undo my perception of myself as Morgi grew sickeningly attached to me. 

"Mummy mummy, I want mummy" a thousand times a day and I did not roll my eyeballs and give him the death stare! I impress myself with my patience.... I leveled up! 

Even spouses could get jealous because Kenneth was supposed to be the kid's person (legend has it). Now he upped his game in Nov by introducing LEGO Technic and all kinds of Star Wars and Super Mario set that can be remote controlled by the tablet. Looks terribly fun but stand aside YY, there are movable parts... 

Fine I stick to what I do best - ART. OMG son's drawings improving by leaps... My genes are amazing!!! 

Even Megan who has never shown any interest in art surprised me with a fantastic canvas at Splatter. LX said her work looks restrained and sophisticated while mine is just vuIgar splashes of color. 

Towards the end of 2020, Morgi transferred to a new school at the advise of his psychologist. The new school had been nothing short of awesome and the amount of celebrations they organized were simply unbelievable. This is a school that knows how to have fun.  

Even 2 boxes of cupcakes brought in for kids to share at mealtime can turn into an epic birthday celebration. If we had any concerns of Morgi integrating, his cheeky smiles and all the "I LOVE YOU" from his classmates swept all worries away. It was really four months of wah WAH WAHHHH...  

 

Is this the right school? Is this a better school? Did we make the correct choice? I think these are the wrong questions. At different stages, he needed different things and we needed different support. We would be totally clueless without EIC at that time when he couldn't eat or look at people when he talked. We would not know he adapt to friends and bigger groups so well without Kids N Kins. And maybe because there were so many interesting daily interactions with friends that he started telling us about his day. 

2021, Morgi will move to a new school again (4th school). Gifted or not gifted, the amount of work to get him pass this first stage is the same. So excited for his new school... Anyway it is his journey and he is leading the way. We are all mere supporting cast cheering him along. 

Somewhere in the middle of the year, mimi gave me a fair reminder - Megan felt too matured for her age, too considerate for others and sensitive to others' emotions. I need to remember that she sees and feels my focus on Morgan plus my frustrations with many many things and this 9 years old has been sharing my burden to become part of my attention too. Hmm... Mimi is right.

Ah my little gal.... I must remember to let her know I love her so much! 

 

 

It turned out that I did not need to wait till 2022 to sit back and enjoy M&M cooking for me. These kids are fast at picking up kitchen skills but this sushi lunch took them one and a half hours to get ready and I was starving. M&M did great and MMM cooking/ baking had to be one of the highlights of 2020. 

At the close of the year, I did my favorite activity - throwing things away to make space. It was time to let these old dirty A-Z felt/ cloth books I made for Megan more than 10years ago go. I let Morgi write on them one last time and said my goodbyes. 

2020 was such a unique year. We were handed free time. We were forced to face ourselves and people we live with. Without these conditions, we would not be able to see the changing needs of Morgan. We saw. We acted on it. We should be proud of ourselves since most people will just continue lamenting and change nothing because to act upon something is scary and tiring. But looking back, all I could remember were fun and laughter, trials and errors. 

And look where we are today. 

Cheers 2020. And bye bye. 

Covid-19 Coming to the end of...

It is coming to the end of Phase 2.

It is coming to the end of Orange.

It is coming to the end of the year.

Xianger and kids over for Pizza and chill

A very risk adverse Megi grumbling non stop about the potential fire hazard of carrying lanterns and getting bitten by mozzies on night walks verses a "I must carry all the lanterns I can carry and do my mandatory walkabout" Morgi.

Halloween makes Morgi very happy 

Mogi has grown up a lot in the past few months. Taller. Cheekier. He requests to change his toothpaste from Kodomo Grape to Colgate because he is a big boy now and what is the fluoride level of Kodomo, mummy?... Where is this come from? Also,  he officially joins his sister in the lifelong collection of fallen teeth. 

In breaking news. Morgan has best friend problems. 

"YS does not want to be my best friend, I don't want to be YS’s best friend because now JP is my best friend"… his miserable friendship rant goes on daily, much to our amusement. 

Ever since finishing his sushi art work, boy has been asking us for his first Japanese food. Where is the sushi man? Points to the menu. "I want that red one, tobiko. That orange one, salmon and that yellow one..." Turns out, other than the raw salmon, he loves sushi and Tobiko is his fav! This boy is growing up to eat just about anything - curries, coffee, stews etc.  Super adventurous with food, and to think one year ago, he can only swallow bread, white rice, steam fish, pork rib soup and prata.  Now, he is making his sister look like a rabbit. Way to go, son! 

Since we are on food, I set up an IG account all about food. Tatsuya likes so many of my posts that I am sure he is secretly following me! (Why can't he just follow me? Alex says Tatsuya is big shot so I should follow him first then he will follow me back, that is how IG works.) Ha... I aspire to this level of pettiness! 

In a funny way - cooking liberates me. Knowing how to cook gives me a sense of control - that the kitchen and fridge are mine and I can plan what I and kids want to eat. That sense of control, ability to move things my way is so important for my mental wellbeing and my sense of home pride. Control, even a perception of it, is comforting. This, I believe, is why I cook. 

My patisserie chefs are both earning their keep as well. 

Massive chocolate discount inside T3 so.... 

. 

Fruit tiramisu is now a staple in the household. Chef Meg also makes a mean luncheon meat bun

Talking about luncheon meat. I was queuing up in Sheng Siong that very moment Man in Pink announced CB and people around me started to murmur "lockdown Lock Down LOCK DOWN", I quietly slipped two cans of luncheon meat from the nearby shelf into my basket.  WE WILL RUN OUT OF FOOD!!!! Ever since that day, I have been progressively stocking up on luncheon meat but we hardly ate any. I counted 6 cans of luncheon meat in my cabinet so now, luncheon meat buns feature aggressively on the menu. 

Chef Morg is proving to be the king of patisserie. Here he is, demonstrating his first apple pie with poise and ease. He wants to showcase every step including stealing the knife from me to slice the apples... No.. No... NOOOO...

The apple pie is just too delicious that Chef Meg also starts to bake the same thing! When the taste is the same, one can only level up with aesthetics. More is more. 

Government or rather some ministers encourage citizens to take up a second job for better job security... Mere patisserie is not going to cut it, M&M need to double up and show me dumplings, ratatouille and I hope more. Target 2022, I can sit easy and M&M make lunch. 

We watch the cartoon Ratatouille but Morg is so not interested that we fast forward to the scene where the rat makes the dish of ratatouille and Linguini serves it to Ego. 

Comprehension time! 

Mummy: Who actually cook the dish ratatouille? Linguini or the ra.....

Morg : Me! I cook ratatouille! 

(roll eyeballs, waste of a cartoon)

I am still upset over my failed bake-a-frog-bread. Megan suddenly produces a lego frog. Easy wat she said.... wow wow wow....  I do not take competition well so must one up her with an elephant. 

Next. Buildings. Bet she cannot beat a trained architect on this. So of course I win round. In the end, Megan abandons her structure and starts to build a story into my building instead

Roof - Aspiring actress looking for attention, waving to non existence audience on the street below. Megan takes half an hour trying different hairstyles and outfits on this character so it better be awesome. 

Level 3 - Photoshoot going on. You can see the photog holding a large camera and all the flash lights in the studio all making the model look shiny and beautiful. 

Level 2 - Megan says guy is very pale. Likely dying from covid. All is not good. But I designed blooming flowers at his window latch so evidence is showing that guy is pale by nature and waters the plant regularly. 

Level 1 - The battle between Thor and some star wars character. Treasure in the form of a flaming sword is in the bin. Think they are fighting over it... 

Morgan enters the competition too, though he is a bit off the brief. It is a landscape with tall trees and suddenly water comes and washes all the bushes, plants and people away. ok.... thank you for the morbid storyline. It is a story, nevertheless. 

Bits and pieces of Morgan's daily necessities like his comb and Dyson vacuum cleaner can be found all around the house. He copies daddy and uses his Dyson to vacuum his toys. Megan too, has high tech glasses and stuff lying around. Without Kar Kar, the house is no longer spick and span. Lego at every corner waiting to bite into our feet. 

We have not done much with the kids. Processing speed games nil. Worksheets bare minimum. The Language Fundamentals assessment book arrived but I don't even know the difference between nouns and verbs to guide Morgi so this will be Kenneth's baby and progress is at a snail's pace. 

With helper gone, the past months have seen Ken and me stretching our time thin between housework, kids, jobs etc. Activities with kids drop to a low with little time, little energy. But life without helper opens many positive opportunities and we see many things. Life is still great. 

Megan’s interest in the latest US Presidential Election is strong. She glues herself to the charts and suddenly ask me one day why I mentioned that people are more educated at the east west coast than central. You mean the beach makes people smarter?

It sparks off a whole discussion on how cities are formed and tracing old marine-time shipping routes, why certain cities grew important and powerful. How trade prosper coastal areas first, leading to better education, healthcare, intellectual and cultural exchanges, more blues (ok I am sorry) etc. How development then expanded along rivers into the inner plains.

Morgan’s globe stand really helps us visualize as we start to discuss the Panama Canal, the Suez Canal, how lucky the geographic location of Singapore is and what if Thailand decides to dig a canal and cut us off… All very interesting, schools should really start teaching geography in Primary 4….. 

But mummy, why would Thailand do that? Why cut their country into half to help others cross faster? And why can’t goods move by land, then no need the Suez Canal at all, goods can travel by land to here and ships can pick up the cargo facing the Atlantic….. 

Errrr…. Hmmm.... Nice chatting with you by the way, you may refer to my sifu, Youtube for the answers.... 

Covid-19 Eight months on, the journey is mine

Reminiscing with Alex, my ex FS, MO F&B consultant on the old days where we will meet for projects and try out all the good restaurants in new cities. Hotel bartenders will be desperately force feeding all the consultants cocktails non stop, everyday during pre-opening just to get their mix right (we are the sleep deprived, 24 hours available guinea pigs who need a drink to survive getting the damn hotel ready). 

Now, Alex is back in HK, complaining about how small his kitchen is compared to his London home, sharing recipes and cat photos with me. And what am I doing? 

.... am texting Alex why the hell is my brinjal and mince meat taste off. 

This is not a food blog. This is an expedited portfolio of one month's worth of cooking...

Now Ken, Megan and Morgan are my guinea pigs. Having captive audience, I too, force feed them new creations I just learnt. Megan likes some, Morgan hates some, Ken try not to waste proteins in general...

And I learn a very simple logic from this cooking journey. The logic why parental advise almost certainly never works.

Mimi is a good cook and the folks at home like my in laws' food. But I do not seek out mimi's recipes and I keep my in law's tips at bay. Why? Because both are not helpful, their levels are way too high for an amateur like me. 

All their tips and instructions will have 90% of the steps missing (esp my mum!!!) because they assume I have some basic knowledge, which I have none. I rather call Youtube and Google my sifu than to frustrate myself getting guidance from the pros. 

Same logic why kids will never listen to parents' advise (all the hardships condensed into one shortcut to avoid all those unnecessary pain)... Totally irrelevant. Unless the kids experience the journey for themselves, they don't even know WTH are parents talking about. 

Which brings me back to... now that I have cooked and tasted my own cooking. I am more ready to reach out, knowing what to ask and what I want to achieve. And yes, I will cook that fish... 

From staring at construction in New York, Turks & Caicos, Maldives, Beijing etc to now staring at the wok Phillips Pressure Cooker (this is hard, which button to press), I must say wow, the journey is mine...

CB is not the reason for my cooking. It is due to kar kar finally retiring after being with us for more than 9 years. Gleefully she passes me the wok at the handover ceremony. Lump in my throat.

In the first few days apart, Morgan and kar kar behave like lead characters in some star crossed lovers drama, both totally embodying the theme of love, longing and hope via long distance video calls. She will ask the male lead how he is, is he eating well, tears streaming down her cheeks. He will lower his eyes, only repeating her name ever so softly: kar kar.... kar kar.... kar kar....

In all honestly, we all know that is about all Morgan can say. Since his video calls communication skills is... you know...

Any doors opening will yield a "is kar kar home?". Every sound from the kitchen will send him running, "kar kar, you are here!?..... oh it's only mummy." Heart wrenching (only for me), almost too difficult to watch.

But LOVE NEEDS COURAGE... Helpless longing scenes change gears to brave determination. "When I am 18 years old, I can fly to Jakarta.", says the brand new man standing taller. Ticket and luggage on wheels obviously well prepared in advance as audiences wait in bated breath for "13 years later..."

For now, Mr Morg set himself to work. Chef Morg Bakery opens every Sunday. Limited Edition everything. 

Takes to gambling to numb himself... NAY this story will be too typical... No black jacks, not yet. Poker cards to train his processing speed for now. Maths board game is this month's old/new toy. Throw 2 dices, you can flip the number on either one of the dice, the addition, subtraction, multiplication or division of the numbers on two dices. Whoever finish flipping the numbers win. 

Two construction workers in "hard hats" march to the yard on night to tell me that construction in the bedroom has started. Put down the laundry and look at the clock. Ha! It's 8.30pm. Late! Night shift! 

M&M are very proud to show me the site, until I ask to check their BCA approval to resume work permit. No Permit? MOM manpower deployment plan. No? NRIC please, I need to ensure you are not underaged. 

I shut down the illegal site, off to bed! They hurry underneath their construction. Megan's bunk is on top deck and Morgan's on the floor. Ha! You guys are building worker dormitories! I just know something is fishy here! 

Every night, new construction sprout. They say, if you cannot stop them, join them. 

Raymond bought the kids some ancient relics. Bestman Balloons... Have not seen them for at least 30 years. I bet they must be toxic by today's standards but wow what fun. 

Lego Masters unleashes new ideas on what Lego can do. M&M jump to building geometry dash games... Megan transforms my 2D burger into 3D version plus an extra hard boiled egg. Awesome awesome. 

Adreinne's post a blog about how her daughter's school is becoming a UNICEF Rettighedsskole (a Rights School) and Rights schools in Denmark uses the foundation of the UN Convention of the rights of the child as the approach to their entire learning environment. I can see why she is not returning back to Singapore anytime soon. 

Explain to Megan on the way home that children have their rights which are enforced by the law. She scoffs at the notion saying teachers and adults will just override them all.... Oops. Do we? Show me, she says, what rights do I have? Luckily UNICEF has a clean poster and the whole pdf explanation is only 4 pages long... This discussion on all 54 articles will take many weeks so we start with the first 14. Gal will have many things to ponder and maybe select the top 5 rights that are most important to her for us to base our home environment on. 

But, kar kar is gone now so you still have to help with housework ya? I do respect your views but dishes don't wash themselves right?