My favorite son ever

2024 was an interesting year for Morgi with plenty of new experiences. Parenting this fella for the past year was full time competition to see who excelled in discipline. Unfortunately, I was on the losing end since my son monitored the clock quite seriously. “It’s 4pm, let’s start Science revision” was a slap in my face (since I was the one who suggested this, but while waiting for 4pm, my favorite on screen character was just about to expire in a grand way). To off or not to off the TV. That was the question. Discipline backfired. 

Moontent

Father and son ONLY overnight school camp. All mothers were given a “Manager” T-shirt and counselled to Just Go Away. Aka the Gentlemen should could survive on their own... Hahaha, I like a humorous school.

Feel the silent despair of impending separation in this photo. (start of the camp)  Heaven knew we need never be ashamed of our tears, bhawaaaaaa… going to be apart for one full day!!!!

On the opposite end, overly excited managers were happily posting photos of themselves heading to JB for a girl’s day out. FINALLY!!!! BYE BYE BOYZ!!! Me? I secured good seats with Meggi at Hamilton, and slept soundly that night with extra leg room. Sweet.

Boys will be boys. Everything was a competition. New sleeping bag purchased (we had 2 in the storeroom). New tent delivered (we had 1 in the store room). New cooking equipment bought (hello, you are just cooking one meal, bring a pot and cook noodles!)

Let’s rehearse camping in the living room before camping in school. Total eyeball roll… “What if dunno how to set up on site, HOW?” 

Photos of the gentlemen were released a la minute on group chat as proof to management that their family members were still alive. What miracle, they could cook… Oh… Wow, what are the other fathers cooking? Ok. Certainly, some serious competition going on…. Wah that grandmother stove even made an appearance. Pride. 

Chili crabs?!!! Win liao.  

Check out the “other” tents. Legend has it that some dads even ordered ice blocks to provide “air-con” to their stuffy abode. To those who sneaked home in the cover of darkness by climbing over the school fence (you know who you are), you have my utmost respect!!! Moi did the same during my P6 camp but ended up in the police station. Who knew our friendly neighborhood policemen were so hardworking even at night. 

 

Home Theatre

One evening, Morgi suddenly declared he was staging a play and gathered us in his room. Needed 2 more person to act and 4 audiences - generally more than our household population. Oh wait, he counted his soft toys…

Lights off, torchlight suddenly switched on with Morgi narrating a story about a treasure on an island guarded by a monster…” Dad, your turn! Now! Next scene, off the lights Mum, change scenes. Dad HERE!!!” All super chaotic with torchlight on and off, Ken and Meggie ushered everywhere in and out of the spotlight. Nobody knew the role they were playing or the storyline.  Just wing it! Impromptu. 

Suddenly ended off with a bizarre mass dance. Best play ever.

Chinese Tuition

In line with our slow awareness on all things school related. In Aug, we shockingly discovered Morgan’s Chinese result was a FAIL. Time to take the hard stance as a responsible parent… Tuition! But. How to sell tuition to a wimpy kid? My successful strategy was to put him on a month-long cocktail of hard-sell, potential results glamorization, passive aggressive “all your peers have tuition except you” plus a somewhat apologetic plea to just TRY, you might like it?  

SUCCESS.  Well done, Morgan. Well done, us. 

A Yellow Butterfly

Morg found a caterpillar and happily adopted it. Less than 24 hours, he was horrified at the amount of poop a caterpillar can produce. Instead of learning about pet care 101, he was more excited to have found a great name to his new love. Thou shall be called Poopido. 

Sonny spent the following weeks staring out of the window calling for his yellow friend to visit and pestering me to bring Poopido to the butterfly park to make friends. 

Happy Birthday

For the first time ever, Morgi invited his friends for his Birthday. Almost burst out in happy tears. MORGAN HAS FRIENDS!!!! 

He was so happy. We were so happy he was so happy. 

Sigh… No wonder sonny is my favorite son ever. 

Japan Trip 2024

Japan holiday with the kids in Nov and time simply flew by... Weather was great, nobody got sick. Two and a half cabin size luggage just enough for 4 of us with ample space for shopping loot!!! We did what we set out to experience - bento on the Shinkansen, frenzy scooping up discounted Isetan food after 7pm, mandatory picture of the Gilco Man...

Tokyo

Always wanted to skip Tokyo altogether... BUT... I really wanted to visit TeamLab. Interesting start to the journey... 

I have deep affection for the Harry Potter series so this place was on my check list. With such high expectations, I was slightly disappointed that we were not sorted by the Sorting Hat upon arrival. I wonder which house I would be in. But we did spent a good 4 hours from beginning to end. 

"Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike." 

— Albus Dumbledore

"Youth can not know how age thinks and feels. But old men are guilty if they forget what it was to be young." — Albus Dumbledore

"If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." — Sirius Black

"When in doubt, go to the library." — Ron Weasley

And so we did! Not to the library but to a second hand comic stall in search of anime. Serious stuff.

Osaka

One day, the kingdom of the peaceful mushroom people was invaded by the Koopa, a tribe of turtles. The mushroom people were turned into stones, bricks and even field horsehair plants. And the Mushroom kingdom fell into ruins. 

The only one who can undo the magic and return them to their normal selves is the Princess Toadstool, the daughter of the mushroom king. Unfortunately, she is in the hands of Bowser, the king of the Koopa. We, the Mario warriors set out to earn as many points as possible to free the princess and restore the fallen kingdom!

I was not even a Mario fan but I needed to get my hands on their merch after running around Mario land. This place was way too cute.

Jaws was a big part of my childhood yet M&M had never heard of the movie. Threw them into the deep end without much context or what to expect. Morg was quite rattled. I was... wah this was soooo good.

Kuromi - who the hell is she? Mr. Morg, to our disbelief, insisted we stayed and watch Kuromi sing and dance!! Infinity infinity infinity!!!! Bizarre scene of Morgi dancing with whole bunch of adult fans. I flatly commented in the crowd that the only bunny I like is Miffy, with Megan going into immediate panic, "ma, you cannot say that loud!!!" Death stares from all My Melody fandom. Oh. Different groups yah?

USJ was such a happy place. I found myself smiling the entire day... 

Osaka Aquarium - this was as close to diving as I can show my family. The ocean and its creatures have their ways to enchant us and draw us into their deep mysterious world. So calm, yet powerful. M&M could sit there watching fish for hours. Even Ken was mesmerised like a little boy trying to take everything in. 

Kyoto

Fushimi Inari Shrine! Insta perfect tori gates was one thing but the food stalls right outside were the real deal! Street stalls selling Wagyu and Kobe beef steaks!!! Megan voted wagyu whereas I was camp Kobe all the way. Didi preferred his Potato Tornado... Ultra pretty and tasty daifukus and candied strawberries just a few meters away. Snacking was never this good.

Morgan was dead serious about Omikuji. He wanted the full experience shaking the box, exchanging for the fortune written on a piece of white paper. Google translate could not fully placed his fortune in the good/ bad category. Hence, following traditions, he had to fold the paper and left it behind at the Shrine. It was charming. 

Mr Morg said his fav place on this trip was Nara - because he overcame his fear of feeding the deers! He became brave. 

Meggi's fav place was the Arashiyama Bamboo Forest. Or not exactly the forest, since we were so blissfully distracted by all the shopping and food along the Saga-Toriimoto street leading to the forest that we barely enter the bamboo section. Meggi declared after an hour, "maybe we should just forget about the bamboo (and continue to explore the much more exciting streetscape)". 

A Miffy Bakery!!!! OK, let's skip the Bamboo forest. I agree! In life, we must have priorities... Mocha ice-cream, possibility the best ice-cream we have tasted in our lives... Actually, in hindsight, we should stay a night right here. Advice to anyone reading this blog. Stay. Bring more cash. 

Japanese food can never be not nice. 7-11 was Morgi's standard visit everyday. There was always space in his stomach for a 7-11 Onigiri. So much so that he even pray to the onigiri section - Never run out, Please Please never run out... 

Happy happy food... I miss Japan already....

We finally got rid of Fraud

We all heard of horror stories about helpers. Well, this is not one of them, though I also finally got rid of mine after 3 months. Hurray!!! Way too long, Ken would say. Should have returned her after 2 weeks. This blog is about the hilarious story of our now ex-helper. Let’s call her Fraud. 

Fraud came as an experienced ex SG helper, scoring a 4 on GHW. However, within a few days, we realized she does not know how to use a tablecloth. She belongs to the generation where wet tissue and kitchen towels are used for everything. My environmentally sustainable home practices went down the drain the first day Fraud appeared. High wastage, low results is her specialty. Water bills shot through the roof and our house has never been dirtier in the last decade. Yet, she scored herself 8/10 for her nonexistence hygiene level, hence Ken aptly nicknamed her Fraud. 

Anyway, I am not complaining about housework. Fraud's ultra gigantic unique problem is : 

Fraud would send us off at the door with a radiant smile every morning with “Bye Bye. Be careful! Oh Mdm, you look so pretty today…” LOVE LOVE LOVE (Korean heart sign), First sign of cringe. 

Daily messages reminding me to eat lunch in office and “good night, sweet dreams” messages when I closed the bedroom door at night. Every few days, she would hold my hand and swing them left and right, in her cutest voice shrilled, “I luvvvvve it here, I so happy, I will do everything for you!”… … “Mdm, you look tired, I give you massage” … … “Mdm, I made herbal tea for you…” 该做的不做，不该做的，通通要表现

Fraud loved to share international news with us, interrupting our WFH with “Sir!!! Taiwan earthquake today! The news say blah blah blah”. If I ignore the existence of Morgi loh, she will be the most attention seeking person I have ever met. “Mdm, can you show me how to cut an apple?”… …  ” Mdm, can you show me how to cut an orange?” 看我！看我！

Breaking News – Fraud accidently cut her finger on a protruding metal on the rack. Dramatic girly high pitch wail, followed by sounds of scrambling feet to every room in the house to announce this epic historical event. With her finger held up, squeezing all the blood she can squeezed from the cut for us to see - “Look, look I cut my finger! Come Mdm, look, the metal here, I cut my finger here! Look Sir… Ouufhhhh… I cut my finger! I cut my finger!!!” 

That was nothing compared to the time I offered Fraud a herbal lozenge for her cough. She gingerly popped it into her mouth and immediately jumped round the whole house fanning her mouth, “Ohhh Ahhhh Woooo spicy SPICY woooooahhhhh coooo” … … 10 mins later…. Still jumping around… still Woooo Ahhhh Urhhhhh Ahhh… (please imagine my face during the whole episode)

Within a few weeks, Ken claimed he just wanted to slap her face. But I have invested time and effort training her on housework with mark improvements so I felt it was salvagable. Maybe some guys just don’t dig cute girls (look at who he married)

The last straw for me came after 4 weeks, I told Fraud off for yet another sloppy work and Lo and Behold!!! Her Pathetic Act is The Real Master Class!!! Fraud immediately went from kawaii sailor moon mode into timid mouse + early onset Parkinson disease - both hands in front of her shivering and trembling non-stop. And I do mean non-stop… 

By week 6, I was exhausted. She zapped all my energy yet everyday continued to seek me out for more 看我！看我！爱我！M&M both took to shutting their doors because her constant self-soothing giggles every 30 mins interval became too overwhelming.  

I spoke to Fraud requesting demanding her to behave like a normal human being. She looked at me as if I accused her of destroying Planet Bimbibo with her Pink Ladies Freezing Kiss Move! I had to re-enact how she skipped instead of walk and how she collapsed onto the floor at the main door after marketing as examples of not so normal behavior. She was crushed. I have deprived her of her only known identity across the whole Adorable Spectrum. 

Called the Agent to counsel Fraud about her newly adopted Depressed mode (after cute rejected). Agent went “OMG so irritating, you should just replace her!”. Colleagues all laughed at my weekly helper shenanigans. Everyone told me Fraud is mental, please replace her. OK, I told Agent - Get me a replacement. Which led to Ken being totally pissed with me “I TOLD YOU!!! I told you she is mentally unstable since week 2, you refused to listen! Now your girlfriends say the same thing and you act!...

Even sending her off was high drama. She called Home Shelter (apparently to ensure she will get a free ticket home - But she wants to go Bali instead). Looking back, Fraud will do an excellent job looking after elderly. She will be the long-lost granddaughter the grandparents never have. 

The day Agent called my office to tell me Fraud went crazy; I cabbed home, told Fraud to pack up, Ken was (hahaha) stuck in US because of tropical storm turned Cat 5 Hurricane Beryl, sleeping in hotel lobbies, power cuts, water cuts etc, airport chaos and multiple flight cancellations. 

He remotely participated in the "sending off at the agency" saga, texting me if I was stressed. Oh please, just another day of live entertainment, one ear listening to shoutings in Bahasa, one eye on my Pokémon because its community day and I need that special move. 

The two weeks without helper and Ken. OMG so peaceful + Power Mama activated. Ultra excited to cook once again for the kids. Not too shabby as I have my sous chef and chef de partie on the kitchen team. Batch cook lasagna and all the easy to cook dishes for dinner. 

I even manage to impress myself with my ability to outsource housework to M&M. Morg was assigned breakfast and lunch dishwashing duties, Megan on dinner shift. But the latter is way too anal, dismantling everything into parts to wash and honestly I do not need things THAT clean... Even her meticulous bed and kitchen wipe down is top notch but after a while slack off. As the older sister, she is efficient, wasting no time ordering Morg to stop whining! A great no. 2 to have. 

House is even cleaner after Ken returned home because he took over his fav mopping while I concentrate on my fav ironing. Ordered Tingkat to lessen cooking needs and though the days are more tiring, we realized this is all very doable. No maid (for a while), no biggie. Somehow everyone did their bit and made this transitional phase look easy peasy. Ken and I are honestly so proud of ourselves and the kids for our flexibility to changes. 

Neo Garden tingkat is really good

In the meantime, MOM, please quickly approve our old kat kat to come back. Given a choice I prefer drinking wine at mad charcoal, going for facial, Netflixing and long bitching sessions with friends…